Effort.tv News

This Blog is officially archived. A new Effort.tv is up.

2008-06-03T09:11:00.003-04:00

If I may please have the attention of my two readers. This blog has officially been archived. Since early this Spring Effort.tv has been all but nonexistent and I have been meaning to rebuild it. Alas, a new Effort.tv has been erected on wordpress at http://effortinc.wordpress.com/ The http://Effort.tv address will be forwarded to that same URL soon. From now on all my blog posts will occur on the front page of the new site. Use this old blog to stroll down memory lane.

Bye for now,

Spencer Cooke, Effort Inc

Rapid Transit Video #13 - Vancouver, Whistler, BC local creeks

2008-05-25T19:17:00.005-04:00

Rapid Transit Video Producer, Daniel Windham, has produced a really cool short film on some local creeks around the Vancouver and Whistler area of BC.

It's a really handsome video and I recommend subscribing to the podcast. Daniel's editing is mad stupid wack junk dat you gots to seez! He likes to get all crazy and carry two cameras in his kayak at once so he can film some actual film and then film some actual HD. One thing I wonder is if we are all incorrect saying that we are "filmmakers" and that we are "filming" when we are using digital cameras with these tiny tapes. I guess there is film in those tapes but isn't a film camera one that holds film, like an 8mm or 16mm camera? Well, that's what I think, and usually try not to say that I'm filming or that I'm a filmmaker because I don't use "film" the traditional way. Unless film accidentally slips out I usually just say that I am videoing, which isn't really a grammatically correct word, but that's just how I am... I guess.

See Daniel's rocket sauce inspiring video in Flash on the main Rapid Transit page at http://rapidtransitvideo.com/ and see what Daniel wrote about producing the video in his blog post http://www.rapidtransitvideo.com/blog/?p=63 where you can also view the video in Quicktime format or subscribe to the Rapid Transit Podcast.

Good day,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv (Not to be confused with Effort TV, which I don't know what is. My site is Effort.(dot)tv, not Effort TV. This is the internet, not TV. Maybe I'll get a new site called Effort.internet to keep everyone from misnaming my web site.)

Free IR Drysuit anyone? Just grow a Mustache.

2008-05-13T20:37:00.005-04:00

There is a season just beyond the horizon where the talents of kayakers and lip hair farmers join forces to become one big idiotic mess all over the internet. This season is known as the Curt Davis Invitational Mustache Growing Contest of Paddlesports. This year IR has title sponsored the event to bring you The Mustache King 2008. As title sponsor IR will be providing their top-of-the-line DoubleD drysuit to 1st place as the grand prize. Yip, you read correctly. All you gotta do is grow a stache and you will be styling it up dry as a bone in a brand new drysuit. Check out the video for a little motivation.
http://themustacheking.com/vid/mustacheking2008.mov

Remember, only a mustache demands respect and is truly rewarded.

Enter while there's still time. Visit TheMustacheKing.com

A special gift to mankind.

2008-05-08T10:24:00.002-04:00

I think we all know that this had to be done. Is it embarrassing? Yes. Am I completely humiliated? Not really. Was I proud to have documented such an occasion? Yes. After all, it's just nature doing what nature does. Please send thank you cards, snacks and money donations to the below address.

With love,
Spencer Cooke, Effort Inc

Rapid Transit Video #11 - Morocco Surf Kayaking Adventure

2008-05-03T12:20:00.005-04:00

Today is May Turd and as an ode to my former "News on the Turds" I give you the Morocco Surf Experience.

Click HERE to see the video, download the podcast, read the journal and live the experience... so to speak.

Our silly crew of surfing chalkies on the beach at Tafadna, Morocco

Joey and I experiencing life in Morocco.

This was incredible kayaking trip for me. I hope you enjoy as much as I did.

Later,

Spencer Cooke, Effort Inc.

Two new Rapid Transit Videos

2008-04-28T09:51:00.004-04:00

Two new Rapid Transit videos have been posted in the past couple weeks.

1) Cooper Lambla's second video journal installment from New Zealand. This time, the South Island.
Click to view the video at Cooper's Rapid Transit Library
Cooper drops into a huge rapid at Nevis Bluff

2) I did indeed attend the 4th annual NAWF at Short Creek and the Locust Fork in Alabama, followed by an incredible trip down the Little River Canyon. The video event coverage is a little late but it's here nonetheless, featuring tons of happy paddlers.
Click to view NAWF/LRC video
Here I was NAWF morning, cooking breakfast in the snow. Twas freezin' ase cold. (photo Adam Motes)

As always you can subscribe to the Rapid Transit Video podcast via iTunes or at the Podcast page on the RT site. Enjoy and see you next time.

PS. The Magnum 80 and Thunder 76 by Riot are out now. These two new big boy creek/river boats are incredible additions to the lineup. If you're a biggy then give a try, you likey. You float high, go fast, boof drop, punch hole. You like.

Later,

Spencer Cooke, Effort Inc.

Visit the Rapid Transit Library...

2008-04-16T13:42:00.004-04:00

Dear bloggitizers or boatertalkitizers,

Some folks have made mention of "only three videos up on Rapid Transit." Au contraire, mon frère! If one were to visit the Library one would find oneself finding lots of other videos for one to watch. Recently added/archived in the Library are the Effort.tv 2007 Mion videos. Twelve videos to be exact, all waiting there to be watchitized by your eyezizz. Peruse the site and you might find warm lovely things that make you happy. So, please visit and please please enjoy.

Soon more videos come to Rapid Transit:
Cooper Lambla New Zealand S Island
Daniel Windham BC'faganza
Effort Inc/Deadman Morocco Surf Trip
Alabama Love Fest

... and more and more and more. Takes little bit of time to edit. We trying our hardest.

Love,

Spencer Cooke, Effort, Inc, looking my smoothest.

Mustache hair has been stalled out...

2008-04-10T13:05:00.001-04:00

Face Hair Fans,

Due to some unforeseen circumstances the Mustache King will be postponed until June 1st. The new contest dates are June 1 - July 31. There is still room for competitor entries so please feel free to enter between now and then. Visit TheMustacheKing.com for more info.

Besides, Mustaches are way more fertile during warm, summer temperatures.

Thanks, The Mustache King

New Rapid Transit Video up from Cooper Lambla

2008-04-08T22:25:00.003-04:00

Check out Cooper Lambla's first video journal installment on Rapid Transit. http://rapidtransitvideo.com

Notes: We have been having some major problems with the server we were using but we have changed the whole thing over as of today. It's a real bummer because the site has only been up for a month now, but I think it's all taken care of. It's loading way quicker now.

If you have trouble viewing Rapid Transit Videos via our site, please notify us. Some suggestions to help you view the videos if you are in fact still having trouble.

1) Make sure you have the latest version of Adobe Flash. There is a link directly on our home page for the latest download.

2) If that does not work for some reason you can view some of the RT videos in quicktime format in a few different spots.

First, you may go to MionFootwear.com and view in quicktime from their home page.

Next, you may subscribe to the Rapid Transit Podcast. Right now all our featured videos are available there and we are considering just putting all our stuff up as podcasts. You can go to the iTunes music store and search for Rapid Transit and get the free subscription. You can also subscribe on the Podcast link on our web site.

Lastly, on the Blog or Podcast link on our site you can view the videos in a Quicktime Popup Window.

I hope this helps all the interested viewers have a more enjoyable experience on our site.

Thanks and enjoy the videos,

Spencer Cooke, Effort Inc

PS. everyone should abide by the NO FRUIT BOOT POLICY. Just do it for the love of humanity.

photo courtesy Drew Hayes

Mustaches start growing on Tuesday, April 1st

2008-03-29T09:29:00.001-04:00

April fools? You be the judge of that. On Tuesday, April 1st a handful of the boldest paddlers from around the globe will show off their freshly shaven faces in hopes of becoming the next Mustache King.

Competitors start off skin to wind in hopes of having the finest stache on the planet two months from now, when the contest ends.

IR, the industry's leading kayak gear company, has put up the title sponsorship this year, setting the bar way up high. 1st Place wins IR's drysuit! People will do ridiculous things for an IR drysuit. Wait and see. Among the other prizes we have an Aquabound carbon 4 piece breakdown paddle, Shred Ready helmets, Mion shoes, Zeal Optics sunglasses, some Astral Buoyancy stuff. We also have a feed to WorldKayak.com for our blog, so you can keep up with the hairiness there as well, whatever makes you happy.

Go to TheMustacheKing.com to see all the details.

Please do enjoy,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

New Rapid Transit Video - Heehaw Jones calls about the Green Race Movie

2008-03-18T02:15:00.002-04:00

Recently Heehaw Jones left a voicemail for me regarding the Green Race Movie. He didn't seem all that psyched about it. Here's the link to the video. CLick HERE
Also, heehaw emailed me regarding the launch of Rapid Transit last week, and i quote, "WTF....I had the idea for this years ago."

I'd also like to thank Playak.com for linking me up on their page. I'd like to provide a link to them right here. 100% Independent Kayak & Canoe News

Later,

Spencer Cooke, Effort Inc
Effort.tv

Rapid Transit: a new product from Effort Inc

2008-03-13T23:39:00.004-04:00

Dear Blog Nerds,

I am pleased to announce a brand new video product from Effort Inc. It's called Rapid Transit. You may check it out at http://rapidtransitvideo.com

It is a kayak video site deriving from the collective efforts of various kayak video producers who I like to work with. You may watch lots of videos there, subscribe to the video podcast, read the blog and learn about the producers involved.

Mion Footwear and Riot Kayaks, two of the coolest and most progressive companies in the outdoor industry, are the sponsors of Rapid Transit, bringing all these videos to you for free.

Please enjoy and visit frequently.

May I also remind everyone about IR's Mustache King contest, beginning on April 1st? Please visit the official web site at http://themustacheking.com

Thanks,

Spencer Cooke
Effort Inc
http://effort.tv

Donkey Game

2008-02-22T14:11:00.003-05:00

Everyone may have played a donkey game a time or two. Though, the below image raises some serious questions. Questions like, why is the kid in the picture wearing a pirate's eye-patch? Is this the son of One-eyed Willy? Does he think the donkey is a ninja, and what is he going to do with that paint brush near that poor donkey's butt? Lastly why is the donkey so happy? Even more lastly, why do I have a picture of this toy? I thought this was supposed to be a fun, child's game.

IR Presents: The Mustache King 2008

2008-02-14T15:01:00.002-05:00

We are up and running. Officially, Immersion Research, Confluence, PA based gear manufacturer is the title sponsor of this year's Curt Davis Invitational Mustache Growing Contest of Paddlesports. That name has a whole history that can be found on the 2006 event web site. The new web site for this event is http://TheMustacheKing.com Aside from IR we have six other awesome sponsors giving out huge prizes for this year's event. This competition is gonna be great. You will be able to keep up with the whole thing at our event blog or at our blog feed at WorldKayak.com, coming soon. If you are thinking of competing please be aware that there are only 40 spots available on a first come, first server basis.

Later,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

Mustache King 2008 Sponsors

New Heehaw Jones video I just discovered

2008-02-06T10:49:00.000-05:00

I was just looking at Heehawjones.com and discovered this ridiculous new video .

This next part I was forced to put on this blog because of some legal stuff regarding Heehaw. Basically, we have to sell these shirts for Heehaw Jones due to what his lawyers called "defamation of character" regarding his appearance in Enter The Donkey and Night of the Living Donkey. So, here it is, $12.99 a pop.

Buy it here, I guess...
Effort.tv Store

Oh, I heard that Heehaw is going to make another public appearance at a Night of the Living Donkey & The Green Race Movie showing in Knoxville, TN. It's at River Sports Outfitters on Tuesday March 11th, 7:30 PM. I'm sure he'll be trying to sell more shirts and wanting to sign autographs for everyone. I guess that's what pro paddlers do.

Later,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

Secret is out, defend yourselves

2008-02-01T12:06:00.001-05:00

Now that the secret is out about the zombies it's time that every paddler knew how to defend themselves if faced with the horrible fate as all of the Night of the Living Donkey cast. My friend Damon Bungard was generous enough to pass on the following link about defending yourself against the undead. http://www.fvza.org/zdefense.html
This is obviously good information for any person, kayaker or not. Really, this should be part of swift water rescue training, aca instructor certification, cpr training, pre-algebra and a laundry list of other curriculum.

At the premiere last night some folks were asking about the video soundtrack. You can check it out at iTunes.

Keep an eye on the WorldKayak.com site for more premiere dates for the video. WK ambassadors will be hosting NOTLD showings and some of them will be in conjunction with The Green Race Movie.

NightoftheLivingDonkey.com for more about the video.

Heehaw Calls Us before the big Premiere

2008-01-31T12:39:00.000-05:00

Night of the Living Donkey dot com for more info.

Some things I'm excited about - Oatmeal, Morocco, Donkeys and Zombies

2008-01-29T16:35:00.000-05:00

Hi there to my two lovely readers! I have several bits of news on the tip of my tongue and want to share a little of all of it.

NIGHT OF THE LIVING DONKEY is a new kayak/horror video I've been working on for over a year and it's finally complete. Special people like you may have the opportunity to attend the world premiere in Asheville NC this Thursday night, January 31 at 9pm. Not special people, not like you, may see it on DVD. Even more not special people will never see it and that does not hurt my feelings. Please go visit the web site for the video at NightOfTheLivingDonkey.com Otherwise don't go visit any web site at all. You can purchase the DVD via the site. Additionally you can buy the soundtrack straight from iTunes. Ten of the sixteen tracks from the video are available.

Secondly, I am really excited to announce a new album by my good friends, The Oatmeal Conspiracy. "Friends and Family" is out now and available on their myspace page. You can listen to most of the album there and purchase as well.
A quick view of the album cover...

I am a huge hard core and punk rock lover and those genres consume most of my music collection, though I love lots of other indie, 70s & 80s, hip hop, bluegrass and other music types. Oatmeal have described themselves before as a Jazz Pop band and that does cover some of their sound in my opinion, but not all. Here's my best description of The Oatmeal Conspiracy based on this new record. Ready?

If Steely Dan, Beck, Ween, Jamiroquai and Billy Joel made sweet, sweet, romantic, passionate, sweaty love... the kind that hurts the next day, and spawned a three headed, six legged, drumming, keyboarding, saxophone playing, singing child, it would be The Oatmeal Conspiracy's "Friends and Family" album.

Several of my online kayak videos over the past couple years have included songs from this album. These songs were in their metamorphic state at the time but have now reached full maturity on the album. If you have seen any of my Mion sponsored videos this year you will notice the little jingle at the beginning of the video as the intro to the track, Shady Shack. The most apparent song based on my description of the album is the brand new track, Stephen. Check it out on myspace and buy the album if you are so inspired.

Last, I just got back from a two week surf kayaking trip to Morocco and it was fannnnnntastic. If you can come back here and visit in mid to late Feb I'm gonna have a huge journal from the trip with tons of photos and a video highlight of the trip. I think it will be enjoyable.

I wrote in my journal on a daily basis to bring you the hard cold and explicit facts. It will take a while to transpose all of it to the blog.

Joey and I sort of hugged beside this camel.

We sort of hugged again on this beach.

I've never seen so many donkeys in my life. My hair was messier than this one by the end of the trip.

There were waves.

Tom and Nathan saw us off at the airport and began their journey home in the van, back to the UK.

Joey is now hard at work on his new surf kayak film, INTERFERENCE, and will plan on releasing it on DVD later in 2008. It will feature our Moroccan journey as part of its storyline.

One more note. New post at the Drug Free Lifestyle blog by Chris Brigman.
http://drugfreelifestyle.blogspot.com/2008/01/safety.html

Thanks for dropping by and I will hopefully be back to blog again.

Spencer Cooke
Effort.tv

Underwear Day

2008-01-08T10:36:00.000-05:00

So, does anyone besides me know about underwear day? I'm not talking about dirty underwear day or clean underwear day. No, underwear day is the one day every month that I am forced, socially, to wear underwear. The way I see it you have two kinds of people in this world - Those who wear underwear and deodorant and those who don't. I happen to fall into the "don't" category and I know there are tons of dirty kayakers who share that title with me. Hey, I hate to use labels but I have to, sorry. Life can't go on without me first writing all of this. So, before I disclose why underwear day is what it is, let me serve you up an anecdote or two.

John Weld is weird when it comes to underwear. You know who John is? He's the guy who owns Immersion Research. He happens to be a good friend of mine. One of my favorite things about the guy is that he is so awkward about things like underwear, sleeping naked, hugging, etc... That is, he is a huge proponent of wearing underwear, he despises sleeping in the nude, and he's not likely to hug you, especially if you're a guy. I think a lot of his mental problems spring from the fact that I slept naked in his sleeping bag one time. Wellllll, maybe that was wrong, but I did it anyway. Really though, he was all freaky about this stuff even before the sleeping bag incident. He's just insecure with the lack of underwearage in the world. I don't know how many conversations I've had with him about sleeping naked. That totally grosses the guy out. And the hugs... oh the hugs. You ever tried to hug or kiss a little kid who is really busy and he kind of squirms when you get a hold of him. That's John. Hugging him is like trying to give a cat a bath. For John's sake let's hope that he never gets into a hypothermic state where I have to rescue him with skin to skin body heat transfer. While we're at it let's hope for my sake that never happens either.

John brandishes IR's latest underwear style via his stunning physique.

Joey Hall is one of my best friends and he is weird too. Though, he goes commando sometimes so I know he has the stomach for awful things like nude sleeping and hugs. The way Joey is related to this story is a little thing called Bathing Suit Day, which is sort of the inspiration and possibly the arch nemesis of Underwear Day. Bathing Suit Day is something I've heard Joey talk about, even documented on video, and I really believe it has happened to him. It's where all your underwear are dirty and you are apparently too lazy (I don't think you're lazy Joey) to do your laundry. Locked in a self-imposed dilemma you are forced to wear your bathing suit or soccer shorts (umbros) as underwear. That's bathing suit day, so you can see how it is the evil twin of Underwear day, right?

So, recently I started going to a chiropractor. It happens that I made it through several visits without having to strip down to my would be underwear (really my naked arse). That time came and I was caught with no underwear, oh lordy. Chiropractor gave me a hospital gown, the kind without an ass part (is there any other kind?). Directly after that appointment I b-lined it to the store and picked up some boxer briefs. Brief refers to the timeframe in which I wear the things. So far I've pulled two Underwear Day shifts in the same pair. Maybe I should go ahead and wash them now.

Happy Underwear Day people! Actually it was yesterday.

Spencer, Effort.tv

A Treasury of Golden Classics

2007-12-29T19:45:00.000-05:00

Download Video Formatted for iPod, but will play as a Quicktime video too. Be ready to wait, it's 100mb.
How to save to your computer or import into iTunes or your iPod: On a Mac hold down the control key and click on the link, then choose Download Linked File. On a PC right click on the link, then choose Save Target As.

The footage wasn't exactly classic when the video was put together, but seven years later it's getting closer to the point of being classic. Maybe not golden or even a treasury, but possibly classic.

This is a video I put together in the Fall of 2001 during the "flat day" at the Myrtle Beach contest. All the footage was shot by Stowe and Holly Blankenship "the Weenises," Joey Hall and myself and features all the contests that year plus a few other shots. We made about 100 copies on VHS thanks to Drew Hayes, who at the time was the US Mega distributor. His company was called Mega USA as you'll see the logo on the video.

I was thinking of how Drew almost single handedly brought composite surf boats to the East Coast scene. Seems like almost everyone bought a couple boats from Drew in those first couple years.

There had been a couple Stingrays by Spike and a few other odds and ends before that time but for the most part Mega USA infiltrated the market. Of course, Anthony Bell owned one of every odd surf kayak known to man, somewhere in his garage...

Anthony charging one of the dumpers at Tybee.

Not too long after, PS Composites made a huge wave with the Mako boats and things started changing a bit. Point is, it was a great revolution in the surf market and I think the 2000-2001 timeframe was metamorphic for kayak surfing around the East Coast. The video shows what kind of stuff was being done, or at least attempted at the time as well as how good or bad our conditions here can be.

Dave Stroud threw some really sick stuff that year at the OBX contest. He was a bit ahead of the ball as far as lip moves and dynamic surfing.

All in black, we called him Darth.

Felipe, maybe before he was called Felipe.

Going for the lip at Folly Beach in the Riot Boogie.

Of course, Jud Watkins threw down some of the sickest, controlled surf rides time after time. We miss you Jud! Come back! Jud's father, Bruce was a huge promoter of the sport and grew East coast surfing as much as anyone. These guys are true surfers at heart from Wrightsville Beach, NC.

Jud is the kind of guy who can come off the couch and just rip it up. Hopefully he gets back on the horse at some point.

How can you forget the Stowe Show? Stowe Blankenship, founder of boatertalk surf zone and one of the pioneers of East Coast surf kayaking.

Cutting back at the Tybee Island contest.

The Stingray was my first surf boat. This was a trip Joey and I took to Folly, trying to figure out lippers.

We even enjoyed the company of some Westies in '01. Tom Fredricks and Leo Lekas (sp?) came to the OBX event and placed well.

Joey got his first surf boat this year in addition to showing everyone how much of a jackass he was.

In this scene of the video he talked about his underwear. Classy.

Of course, you can't talk about East coast surf contest without Ross Fulcher. Has he even missed one in the past ten years?

Ross getting under the lip at Fort Fisher, NC.

I know there have been a lot more people that contributed to the growth of our sport over the years. Some have come and gone and some stayed. It has been a real pleasure playing with all you silly geese and learning to surf. Enjoy the video.

Download Video Formatted for iPod, but will play as a Quicktime video too. Be ready to wait, it's 100mb.
How to save to your computer or import into iTunes or your iPod: On a Mac hold down the control key and click on the link, then choose Download Linked File. On a PC right click on the link, then choose Save Target As.

See you in 2008 hopefully! I'm planning on being at OBX for the May contest and some in the fall too. In early Feb Joey and I should be putting up some pics, video and a trip report for a surf travel we're about to do. Wish us luck.

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

A McWalBucks Holiday, Yay!

2007-12-28T19:04:00.001-05:00

To my two blog readers I preface the following with the knowledge that I have only been kayaking three times since November 3rd (Green Race day). They were three pretty okay days but nothing amazing. That being said, my time has been spent doing some things that I love and enjoy aside from kayaking. In this time of reflection I have not become a poet, though I thought a holiday poem was in line. I'm sorry in advance.

It was the night before Christmas and I had to run out
To Bed Bath and Beyond
(And maybe even Home Depot if we have enough time)
And the critters were stirring around and about
I saw a typical obese, American family sipping on mocha lattes at Starbucks
And a kid coming out of Target with a new copy of World of War Craft
Yes, this lucrative holiday was well on its way
To ending the year for corporate America with a big heehaw and a hooray!
When on the way home I crossed over the highway
And a full moon was rising on the horizon
"It's beautiful," I thought to myself...
How McDonalds and KFC brighten up the foreground
And what to my wondering eyes did appear
But a hodad in the drive-thru choking on a cigarette...
No, wait, it was a quarter pound...er
I've butchered this rhyme scheme in more ways than one
And this holiday was actually a good bit of fun
There was family and food and a couple of presents
And of course a happy meal for some big fat redneck
Whose name was actually Santa... and it was a super sized combo to be correct
Which brings me back to the spirit of Christmas
Which is naturally ham and presents, and profitability, and global warming, and I usually don't forward emails and my schwetty holiday balls and and and and and and....
... Nope, thise whole thing was just a gas pain. Excuse me.

Enjoy the rest of the year,

Spencer, Effort.tv

Night of the Living Donkey

2007-12-06T09:47:00.000-05:00

Night of the Living Donkey video world premiere at Asheville Pizza Co. Thursday, January 31 2008. http://nightofthelivingdonkey.com to view the trailer.

2007-11-28T14:42:00.000-05:00

Felipe can make almost anyone laugh. This one is a side splitter.

Kite skating looks sweet Philip. Way to take a fall.

2007-11-26T16:02:00.001-05:00

On my kayak I have a black sticker with bold white lettering that says DRUG FREE LIFESTYLE. I'm proud of it. My friend Joey made it for me. My athlete bio clearly states my point of view on this matter. I have stated this out of respect for myself, my peers, those I influence, and those I look up to. Recently someone asked me why I chose to say that I'm drug free. They asked I why would promote Drug Free Lifestyle instead of proclaiming vegetarianism, pro-choice for abortion, a political party, punk rock or religion. Here's why...

2007-11-23T12:18:00.000-05:00

Thanksgiving Addendum

Regarding my September 3rd post about annoying kayaker sayings, I have something to add:
#7 of annoying things that kayakers say is "Training." Don't get me wrong I think training is a legitimate thing in sports, and in kayaking it's more and more relevant as time goes on. The 2007 Green Race is a perfect example. Training certainly legitimizes and validates our sport as "professional." I would just like to go playboating or out creeking one time without someone referring to what we're doing as "training." Dammit, can't we just go kayaking?

While we're at it how about a #8? As quoted above "Professional" is the term. Everybody knows that too many people call themselves professional kayakers. Shouldn't professional be determined by the fact that this is what you do full time, for a living? Even more annoying is how so many self proclaimed pro paddlers suddenly become pro at whatever else it is they do while kayaking, like photography and video shooting. As far as I can tell the main thing that most "pro" kayakers are pro at is not working and not being nearly as pro as they claim.

Happy Thanksgiving. Make sure and give thanks for all your friends who don't take themselves too seriously when using any of these words in reference to kayaking. Try to relax this weekend. Try not to be too hard core. Head to the beach and enjoy just surfing a wave and going fast. You'll find that it's more like creek paddling than you know.

With a certain level of sincerity,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

2007-10-31T08:15:00.000-04:00

History repeats itself, so they say. If you have kids I guess that's even more inevitable. Here's my good Papa Cooke, and myself at almost one year old, circa 1976.

My Dad and his buddy tandem canoe racing on the Nanty in the Southeastern Nationals 1976. Looks like they got a little spun out at Wesser, oops! I'm guessing that's my Mom's finger across the top of the photo... nice 1970s effect, right?

2007-10-26T01:02:00.000-04:00

Ween-O-ween 2007

There's something special about Butt-O-Ween. Something's in the air. Is it the green race? Nope. Is it the freshly permed hair donts of the numerous mullett-heads that populate the mountains of Northern Georgia and Eastern Tennessee? I don't think so. Is it that I have gone on a tangent and there's no easy way back to the original story? Nnnnyyyeeeeeeoossss. Or maybe. Well, this time of year is special to me because on the eve of evil, Halloween, my son was born. November 1 is his official birthday, which is Hallow's eve. Nov 1 is the day that marks the beginning and the end for some. For me it is certainly a day that my old life ended and my much better, new life began. This in all sincerity, I'm gonna have to go off the deep end now and say how proud I am of my son Mason Spencer Cooke who has grown, in one year, into a very filled out 11 year old boy named Michael 07. Not sure where the '07 came from but I'm thinking it's kind of like Number 2 in Austin Powers. Michael is my Number 07 man.

Micheal 07 has made us all proud this year or at least for the last week since I found his photo on the floor of the post office. Since then he has graced the dash of fame in my Nissan where he will remain for as long as his photo can bear the harmful UV rays that cruel star, the sun, shines down.

So, happy birthday-ween my son, Michael 07, wherever you are out there.

Goodlater,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

2007-10-22T23:55:00.000-04:00

Fall at the coast is one of my favorite times of year.

For the past ten years it is routine for me to make three or four trips to the coast for some surfing. By the end of summer I am usually pretty burnt out on the monotony of sales rep preseason orders and I've normally taken about a jillion runs down the Green River Narrows. All that gets old and I like to take a break and head for the beach. Surf kayaking brings a smile to my face and a feeling of joy to my heart.

Mid September I landed at Wrightsville Beach for the 2nd Annual Gordon Invitational with the fine company of one of my finest paddling and surfing amigos, Felipe. Gordon & Paula Rock and the ESKA once again did an excellent job organizing and running the event. We were not blessed with large surf but it was glassy and offshore most of the day with waist high waves rolling in and an occasional chest high on the good sets. Check out the video for a couple shots I was able to get from the beach and with the waterproof housing.
September Surfing Video
Thanks to Rosanne Fulcher, Joey Hall and Alison Latham for filming on the beach. I think I forgot to credit you guys on the video itself.

Felipe gave me a couple board surfing lessons that were invaluable and finally got me up and surfing down he line of a few waves. Surfing a board is such an awesome compliment to kayak surfing. I wouldn't think of quitting paddle surfing but boarding has made me appreciate waves so much more. I'm a board rider at heart with over 20 years skatebaording and 13 snowboarding. It was inevitable that I would end up on a board.

I came out with an almost clean sweep of this year's Gordon Invitational taking 1st in IC, 1st in K1 and 2nd in HP. Russ Buskirk took his first ever 1st place in HP. He surfed really well in his Reaction and definitely deserved the win. I was stoked to get another top 3 placment in the Charger.

Late September, Shari, Mason and I met our good friends Drew and Eileen Hayes for a week down on Hatteras Island.
Eileen, Drew, Drew's rod... and reel.

Drew kept trying to get Shari to sniff the very tip of his tongue. Reluctantly she took a whif.

Drew holds up the lighthouse and saves us all from being squashed.

I can't think of a better place to be than the OBX during the Fall. The sweet sea air feels so good in your lungs, the temperature is usually very moderate in the Fall, there are fish to be caught and waves to be ridden.

The surf was almost nonexistent all week (a big boo hoo for the Eastern Surf Boarding Championships that was being held that exact week) except for one day a passing weather system kicked up waist-chest high swell. Coupled with a light offshore breeze, this was some of the most excellent surf a wave rider could ask for.

Drew paddles out during one of the larger sets.

There was nothing real large or pushy, just clean, crisp rides and peeling shoulders.

The waves were coming in nonstop in perfectly spaced sets with long periods. Drew and I were a couple of happy campers, let me tell you.
Drew hauls tail down the line.

Me getting a taste of weightlessness.

One too many mosquitos came into the car and were ushered right on out of this life and to the next.

Of course Drew introduced my son to a number of criminal activities.

Drew Hayes is not known for sea kayaking.

Lastly, I want to wish all my friends who are competing in the world championships over in Spain good luck and good skill. The break there looks absolutely sick and I wish I was there. I plan on going to the next worlds for sure wherever that may be. After a four year hiatus I feel like I should give it another shot.

Watch the September Surfing Video

Later,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

2007-09-13T00:04:00.001-04:00

How can you not love Yonton?

"Who is that guy on the front row who looks like he just peed his pants and nobody knows but him?" - No doubt an insightful question and statement from the lyrical master, Garrett Bryant.

2007-09-03T14:12:00.000-04:00

My all time favorite annoying sayings that kayakers have created, repeated and basically ruined.

Here we go...

1. "Fire it up!" or "He fired it up!" or "You gonna fire it up?" - This phrase was cool in little league baseball when Dad would shout it out. Kayakers have ruined it.

2. "Yeeeeaaaaahhhhh!" - You have to pronounce this one properly for it to be really effective but it is basically said way too much. It is actually really funny but only if it's said with a strongly sarcastic tone.

3. "It's all good" - This one is not just a kayaker saying but kayakers should not say it because they are already saying a bunch of awful stuff. A kayaker saying this just makes it twice as crappy. There are indeed good things out there but it's not "all good," sorry.

4. "Bro" - Now, can you really take anyone seriously who refers to everyone as Bro? This is also a word that is funny if being said sarcastically, unless the people exchanging it are biological brothers. Then it's just true, not funny.

5. "Give her" or "He gave her" or "I'm gonna give her" - This rates right up there with "Fire it up." Can we all not come together as a community and just say, "I ran that rapid" or "I'm gonna run that rapid"? I thought not.

Well, these are five things that annoy me. If I had a sixth it would be:
6. Kayakers naming "Top 10" things, like "Top ten ways to keep from getting a wedgie while kayaking"... no wait, that is pretty good. It would have to be something like "Top ten ways to run waterfalls" We must stop this crazy crackerness and just get on with the kayaking. I don't know if we can. Let's face it, kayakers are not stylish, cool or funny. They are a bunch of people who, and I quote Joey Hall, "in high school were that guy or girl who had the booger hanging out of their nostril or on their tooth, but nobody told them." Everyone just laughed about it and remembered it for the rest of their lives. It's funny that all those people still have boogers hanging out their nose, only they're sitting in a kayak on the water, and now they have nose plugs and a helmet on too. I love all those people.

Anyone using these words or phrases in 1-6 should be given a wedgie. If you are guilty of saying all these things you get a front/back wedgie, mandatory, and a pink belly.

In honor of my top ten bros out there givin' her and firing it up, here's a video from this summer. It's all good, yyyyyyeeeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

2007-08-21T10:12:00.000-04:00

A profound statement by an equally profound person and incredible kayaker -

"...my talent can't be bottled up by some film or some form, it is
an un-reproducable sensation that in order to fully comprehend one
must watch in the live, actual, personal viewing state of living, or
watching."
- Cooper Lambla

2007-08-02T22:22:00.000-04:00

Big falls at Secret Spot on the Nolichucky.

If you've been to Secret Spot on the Noli in TN you've probably noticed the Dam upstream and the absolutely sick waterfall/rapid on the river left bank. Since water has been so low this summer Caleb Coaplen and I headed up one day to see what it looks like at low flow. Here are all the photos. We thought it still looked completely crazy though runnable. I'm just not sure if it would be worth the risk of getting caught in that dam. I'm not running it and Caleb said he would not be willing to be present if someone did run it, meaning that he thought it was way too dangerous. The photos are taken at around 500 cfs on the gauge.

Mason rode with me too and said that he would not run this drop. Whew!

Caleb points at the first drop. This one is about 30ish feet.

Here's the landing off the first drop and this little drag strip runout.

After about 30 feet you would start dropping again, ideally driving left. You would not want to be up against the dam.

Here is the beginning of the second drop. This one has to be another 30-40 feet.

Here's a different view from the top where you can see the top of the second drop and the very bottom. The whole thing probably drops 80 feet including both drops.

If anyone ever runs this thing it would be pretty crazy. I think it's doable. I also think much harder looking drops have been run. My concern with this one would be safety. If you got stuck in the dam at the bottom it would be hard getting out or being rescued. I'm not encouraging anyone to run this thing. Just giving my interpretation.

2007-07-29T18:18:00.000-04:00

Jade Tree is kayaking music.

Some of my favorite bands are or were on the label Jade Tree out of Wilmington, DE. Consequently, one of my best friends and paddling comrades, Drew Hayes, lives in Wilmington as well. Recently Drew and I met at the Potomac for a day of paddling. I did not paddle Drew or visa versa. Instead we paddled the river, and it needed it too... that silly misbehaving river. Below is a photo of Drew in his element, and at the same time out of his element. Drew is known as a surf kayaker so most people don't know that he can get out and run creeks and rivers with the best of them.

Drew runs the Spout on Great Falls, VA - Photo Andy Gates

Back to the original story. When Drew and I met at the Potomac he handed me an article out of a Wilmington paper about Jade Tree.

The significance of Jade Tree to the sport of kayaking is as follows. There have probably been more Jade Tree songs on kayaking videos than any single record label. I contacted Jade Tree six or seven years ago with an interest in one of their most monumental bands (in my opinion), Strike Anywhere. They were new at the time and into the idea of licensing their music for my videos, which were issues of LVM at the time. LVM Issue 1 features almost all of Strike Anywhere's debut album, "chorus of one." Consequently they were a huge hit with the paddling crowd and other video producers and ended up being featured on other videos on the market. Thanks to Jade Tree other bands have had great acceptance in the paddling world - bands such as Despistado, Micah P Hinson, Ester Drang, Denali, The Loved Ones, Paint It Black, Trial by Fire and more. Jade Tree even re-released three of Avail's albums last year, all of which have had songs on kayak films.

If you are a kayaker looking for cool sounds of all kinds check out Jade Tree and all their talented artists. I think that music incorporated into video is what ingrains memorable images of motion pictures into our minds. To me Jade Tree has done that more than ever and they deserve the support of paddlers.

Read the full article here:
Click to enlarge to a legible size.

Goodbye,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

chris gragtmans photo

2007-07-27T14:15:00.000-04:00

I'm excited about this. Check it out.

2007-07-20T11:04:00.000-04:00

Chris and I went paddling yesterday at the Pigeon. I-40 has some awful, traffic jam causing construction going on at the junction of 240, 26 and 40. To add insult to injury they had to go and use profanity right in front of everyone.

This kind of aggression will not stand.

2007-07-02T20:48:00.000-04:00

How to break through the surf

This is an article I wrote this spring that has just been published in Paddler Magazine. Due to space constraints all the photos that I intended to go along with the article didn't make the cut. I have included those extra photos in this post to further explain the techniques described in the article.

Additionally, come join me on October 19-21 for a surf kayaking class at Cape Hatteras, NC. I will be co-instructing the course with Philip Aschliman through NOC's instruction program. You will be able to sign up through NOC.com
In the meantime I have put together a short video teaser of the skills you can learn in this class, incliding how to paddle out, as detailed in the below article. Download the video by clicking here!

Please enjoy,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

Please click the image for the full size, legible article.

Click the image to see a full viewable size of this sequence.

2007-06-21T19:23:00.000-04:00

"I have to think like an adult here." This is the response I was given by a friend of mine recently when I suggested to him that he should send an entry in to the IR Vacation to Hell. Don't get me wrong, this is a friend who I respect. The reason this stuck out in my mind is because I realized that I would never say something like, "I have to think like an adult here," and I certainly would not rationalize why I couldn't enter the IR event because of my adulthood, or lack thereof. This was one of his reasons for not being interested in the event. Now, if being and adult consists of restricting yourself from things such as the aforementioned then I have another quote for you from one of the greatest punk bands ever, The Descendents - "I don't want to grow up." My son agrees.

Sincerely,

Adult, Spencer Cooke

Here are some of my best friends "thinking like adults."

2007-06-03T02:36:00.000-04:00

Recently Chris Gragtmans and I took a kayaking trip to BC's world class Skookumchuck wave. We had an awesome trip but were greatly disappointed that logging may drastically and negatively change the environment there.

Click here to watch the Skook Video from Effort.tv

Citizens of Egmont (Skookumchuck), BC and a group of concerned kayakers are making efforts to stop a logging operation that will threaten the water source for the town and no doubt leave a nasty eye sore for paddlers and other tourists to see. Please take a moment to write the forestry rep in Egmont, BC. THE DEADLINE to write IS JUNE 6th.

Please read this letter to kayakers from the Skook locals:

An Open Letter to all White Water Kayakers

The village of Egmont, BC, is asking for the help of all kayakers who have ridden (or aspire to ride) the waves of the Skookumchuck Rapids. We have learned that a logging company has acquired the logging license in this area. The logging plans involve three huge clear cuts on the local watershed with one that extends right to the Skookumchuck Trail within the Provincial Park. Also, there is a planned cutblock that would mow down the trees along Egmont Road from Highway 101 to North Lake; a huge cutblock off of Maple Road; and another cutblock on the watershed at the north end of Ruby Lake. As well, the company plans to log Sechelt Nation Reserve lands just inside the Sechelt Inlet just past the rapids.

The residents of Egmont asked if the logging company would take a sustainable logging approach but they said no and so the area's residents have said no to the logging company. We now ask for your support to keep the logging out of this area. We ask that you email the forestry rep before a June 6th deadline at
cam_forrester@dccnet.com
and copy that email to us at skookumnarrows@yahoo.ca

Please address your email to:

Cam Forrester, R.P.F., Consulting Forester
6231 Sunshine Coast Highway, Sechelt, BC V0N 3A7
Tel: 604-885-7142, Fax: 604-885-7112
Email: cam_forrester@dccnet.com

We will be posting all information about this proposed logging and our efforts to stop it on our blog at
www.saveourwatershed.com. We look forward to your support.

Sincerely,

Friends of Egmont

Click here to watch the Skook Video from Effort.tv including information regarding the logging.

And incredibly majestic scene.

If you have been to Skook you know how beautiful it is and that its beauty is worth preserving. You can make a difference by sending a short email protesting the logging operation.

Thanks,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

2007-06-01T13:27:00.001-04:00

so last night i had a surreal dream that i was at the green race and it was at the new river dries. everyone was getting ready for the race but there was this huge wave that looked awesome but it was diagonal so nobody could stay on it in a play boat. i'm not sure why they were in play boats for the race. then, jud watkins shows up in his international surf boat and starts ripping it up, doing all sorts of stylish tail slashes and blunts. the many spectators were impressed. later on chris gragtmans and i were getting ready for the green race in some house upstream from the wave and i looked down and saw some other guy in an ic boat surfing it up on the wave. for some reason i think it was some older british guy. not sure who but the reason i think that is because he was in one of those double dutch ic boats. then things go even more weird. somehow chris and i ended up going paddling somewhere else and suddenly realized that we missed the green race. chris was devastated and i told him not to worry about it because he could just tell people that he decided to skip a race so that he could train up really good for the next year. i'm not sure if he bought that but he didn't argue. after that i was suddenly paddling out in a surf break. i kept paddling through waves and just making it past each one but i could never quite get to the outside of the break. there was some kind of machinery driving up and down the sidelines of the break. i think it was one of those machines that paints the lines on highways. there was a guy standing on the side of he machine looking down. anyway, it was weird that there were sidelines. suddenly i was on what seemed to be a football field, but there were still waves and i was still in the break. only now the waves were coming through the ground so when a swell was moving toward me it looked like the mound of dirt that flies up in front of bugs bunnie's head when he trowels through the ground just under the surface. or like that creature in the movie tremors. or you know when the space ship crashes at the end of the movie men in black and all that dirt is flying up in front of it. that's kind of what it looked like, and the waves were really huge. i was paddling my butt off trying to make it to the outside of the break. i wanted to surf one of these giants so badly. they were shaped perfectly and looks so beautiful, all covered in grass and dirt. meanwhile there was a sports team, i think it was football, practicing on the field as well. every wave that i made it by was followed by another even larger one. finally when i made it to the outside of the break the waves subsided and now they were rolling up the astro turf and closing the stadium. the last thing is that i was sitting at the top of some stairs in a house. i thought i was at the top of a wave about to drop in but i turned out to be this staircase. it was kind of a suburbia house, like in christmas vacation. so i'm sitting there and i asked somebody (maybe it was clark w griswold) if i could catch this last wave before they rolled up the carpet. they said yeah that's fine. so i decided to drop in but all i really did was slide down these carpeted stairs on my butt, bump bump bump bump bump. i guess i was surf kayaking, not board surfing because the sitting down part makes sense. i woke up this morning once i got to the bottom of the stairs. i was dreaming hard and for some reason all of this stuck with me today so i decided to write it down.

2007-05-23T02:13:00.000-04:00

No more news on the turds. Joke is over. From now on, news whenever I want.

2007-05-13T08:57:00.000-04:00

Happy Mothers day everyone. And what a way to celebrate mother's day than to fix a toilet. This piece in the back of our commode broke and I had to replace it. It is the part in the water tank that has that floaty thing on it with the water cutoff valve. You know what I'm talking about. Upon changing out the old part for the new one I made a wonderful discovery. Check out the name of this part...

Hey, it says it right there, plain as day. Toilet humor is my favorite.

2007-05-03T08:39:00.001-04:00

The extreme kayaking market can only bear so many great product ideas, and this just happens to be one of them. The BRO DOLL! Yes, now available exclusively from Effort.tv, get your very own pro model BRO DOLL. Tired of hanging out alone without your bros, not any more now that you can buy a BRO DOLL. Be the first on your block to purshase BRO DOLL and show all the non-bros how cool it is to hang out with a bro... a BRO DOLL that is. BRO DOLLS start shpping as of May turd and will arrive at your doorstep fully ready to speak broisms and wear their hat sideways with the best of the bros. Get yours now!

2007-04-30T16:49:00.000-04:00

Mion Footwear is an awesome new shoe company, started by the former owner of Keen, Mr Martin Keen. Though, do not be confused, Mion is not affiliated with Keen at all. Mion (My Own) is a brand new company and Martin Keen has created some incredible new designs. Mion is totally committed to the environment and to prove it they have gone carbon neutral, meaning they do not pollute. Part of the way they achieve this is by buying back green energy, using terrapass for all their rep vehicles, and more. As part of my relationship with Mion I provide kayaking video content online for the paddling community and consequently, for any and all visitors to the Mion site as well. Visit MionFootwear.com and you'll see this image after the homepage loads. I usually update this video once or twice a month with a brand new video. The URL always remains the same but the video changes monthly click HERE to see it

Chris Gragtmans and I headed down to the Ocoee last weekend for a demo day/river with Overflow Outfitters. Officially, this was a stop on the Riot "paddle with some fabulous guys" tour. Kevin Palmer from Overflow met up with us at the putin with a couple of his chaps from Northern Georgia. Anywho, we had a good ol time on the river then retreated to Ducktown or Copperhill for some Mexican cuisine. I believe it was Kevin who said, and I quote, "they should just cut out the middle man and just dump this food directly into the toilet." And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why Overflow Outfitters is such a successful retail shop.
Here sat our dinner club while Chris told some campfire stories about wild and scenic Africa. Chris is here to learn and to entertain, not to make out with you.

James Trombley works at Diamond Brand in Asheville NC. Recently, James his his first loop, air flip, on a trip we took to the Nolichucky. He was psyched out of his gourd and his excitement is the inspiration for my newest video. Check it out. .
Here is James as happy as a lark...

Good buddy Cooper Lambla met us there and threw some of the nastiest space godzillas I've seen. Kid was absolutely going off the hook in the Astro 58. Tall, lanky, lightweight kid + short, high volume playboat = large air.

My friend Colin Kemp was with us on the Noli that day and I also took him over to Eternity hole for a session one evening. Colin works for Jackson Kayak and used to run a shop in DC called Valley Mill. Colin is 6'5" and 230 lbs. It is so awesome seeing a guy that large absolutely kill it in a play boat.

Our night session at Eternity. The water is coooooold and the kayakers were blurry they were moving so quickly.

Alas, the Green finally turned back on at 100% after almost two weeks of 60% or being shut down. Nathan Silsbee and I got out on the water a couple days and filmed some river running and down river freestyle in the Magnum and Thunder. The Magnum proves itself time and time again as a great creek boat and the Thunder is definitely on its way to doing the same as a playful creeker or beginner/intermediate river runner. The Riot Booster was one of Riot's most popular boats over the past few years until the Magnum and Thunder arrived. The popularity of the Booster's smooth and forgiving, yet surfy and playful hull inspired us to make the Thunder. People loved the way the Booster surfed and handled down river but wanted a larger, more creeky style deck, and the Thunder was born. I've paddled the boat a bit on the Green and at the US National Whitewater Center and thoroughly enjoyed it. I would highly recommend it, especially for the paddler who is beginning and wants something safe that they can grow into and not grow out of immediately. It's also perfect for the intermediate to advance creeker who enjoys class IV, Wilson Creek type of runs.
Here is Silsbee going for the freewheel off of the Groove Tube boof.

Silsbee running a smooth line at Sunshine

Once again, click HERE to see the new video featuring all the above topics. Visit my Youtube channel for all my archived videos youtube.com/kayakvideo

Later,

Spencer Cooke
Effort.tv

2007-04-23T15:38:00.000-04:00

In an attempt to keep the feeling of Effort.tv's "news on the turds" alive I will be reporting on a rather appropriate topic today. Yes, here in Charlotte NC it's April twenty-turd... but everywhere else it's just a plain April twenty-third. I'm here at the US National Whitewater Center for a short visit.

As a sales rep I was privileged to use the exclusive employee restroom when I came across one of the funnier things about this place. I nearly peed my pants upon entering the restroom when I saw this sign beside the door. By the way, "peeing your pants is the coolest. Everybody my age pees their pants." So says Mr Madison anyway.

To me this sign says, "Come on in. We accept men, women and unusually small people or monkeys in wheelchairs." Or, "use the bathroom here if you are a giant man or woman or a normal sized person in a wheelchair." Whatever the meaning, those people a the USNWC need to get their heads Z-rayed.

Later Garrett Bryant and I celebrated our newfound, glorious, stupendous bathroom sign by eating an entire birthday cake and a dozen cheeseburgers. To explain Garrett's cast, he had a horrible birthday cake candle blowing out accident and broke his arm.

While I'm on the topic of hilarious, new, unusual and exotic signs, I was up in Boone NC last week when I visited my beloved Boone Baglery restaurant. To my delight they have banned smoking in their facility.

And that, boys and girls, is how to not get your head stuck in the rear end of an adult gorilla. The end.

2007-04-13T12:46:00.000-04:00

Back in October Ray Cotton and Drew Hayes did a surf trip to Panama and found some large waves. They took one of my video cameras and got a few shots. Well, the footage wasn't that great but I was able to pull some still grabs from it so you can see the size of the stuff they were surfing... enormous.

Of course the normal tomfoolery was at hand. Driving across rivers way too fast in the rental vehicle.

And they probably yelled at those cows when they got close enough.

This is Ray. Drew was not available for a photo session. The last time he had his glamour shots done he swore he'd never step foot in front of a camera again. That silly puddy accident taught him a lesson.

That little thing at the top of the wave is Ray dropping in.

This was a quite impressive double-up wave that Drew managed to escape. Drew seems to be able to sprout wings out of his butt and fly out of some of the nastiest waves you've ever seen. I don't know how he does it. Scary. Sometimes Drew just sprouts the wings for no reason at all. He doesn't even have to be kayaking. I think he's just showing off his butt wings.

Maybe at some point they'll expand on the trip report but for now that's all I know. They did mention a couple really bad beatings and one swim that scared them pretty bad. Sounds like Panama in October is large and in charge.

2007-04-03T22:18:00.000-04:00

Hi there freindzzzzzzzzzzzz. I've been thinking a lot about penguins lately.

"It's too damn hot for a penguin to be just walkin' around. I gotta send you back to the South Pole!"

2007-03-30T10:36:00.000-04:00

Happy March Turdieth and welcome to Effort.tv,

People often ask me what I write first, the music or the lyrics, to which I reply, "Neither, I'm not a musician or a song writer." Actually, I only talk to dogs, cats and little people.

Now, this is some funny donkeylore... http://www.saludayakerz.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=2307

Speaking of the Saluda, here's some footage from there, plus more.

The Saluda River in Columbia SC is the best kept secret in play boating in the southeast. Tell someone about it, or tell them to go there and that it's great and all they says is, "oh yeah." Haha! It's hilarious, their one mile stretch is better play than any river around here and nobody acknowledges it. I love it. Then there's 1/4 mile hole at the Noli... incredible. Eternity hole on the Tuckaseegee is great too, probably one of the coolest man-made play spots ever. Enjoy the video from Jan-March 2007. Disclaimer: You may not want to watch this if you're a "creeker" or a "big play features only" kind of person. Make sure you're totally secure with lesser kayakers on "small" and "easy" play spots.

The holidays are beautiful this time of year. Seasons greetings,

Spencer Cooke, Effort Inc

2007-03-23T23:28:00.000-04:00

There's a podcast that I listen to regularly that always plays audio clips from this video, "Leprechaun Sighting." I had seen it before but after hearing the audio for the millionth time I was finally persuaded to look it up on youtube again. Now... if this doesn't convince you not to do drugs then I'm not sure what will. On the other hand it could cause you to start doing drugs...

I guess I should talk about something paddling related. Here's something. I haven't paddled with my very good friend Ray Cotton in quite some time, months actually. Ray said he hadn't paddled since October when he and Drew Hayes went surf kayaking in Panama. So, we met at the Green a couple days ago for a nice run at 100%, which turned out to be 200%. It seems that someone fell asleep in the powerhouse and fell on the lever that lets the water out. Must've been Homer Simpson. Here was Ray styling it out as usual, off the couch even.

In other news my wife and I decided it was time to introduce our son to the finer things in life. First on the list was the appreciation of donkeys. He's got it dialed already.

I have nothing more to offer today which is fine since I'm the only one who reads my blog.

2007-03-13T01:01:00.000-04:00

Recently I took a trip down to the US National Whitewater Center in Charlotte NC. I paddled a couple runs through the different channels in the Riot Thunder and really enjoyed the boat. Here is a headcam video I took while doing so.

The rapids at the USNWC are broken into two main channels - the race, "competition" channel and the "wilderness," freestyle channel. Rapids range in difficulty from Class I up to Class IV. This video is a paddlers perspective of running the two channels. Enjoy.

2007-03-03T21:06:00.001-05:00

Feel like a March turd today so here's a new video. Wintertime creeking with Linville Gorge, Toxaway, The Green, Raven Fork, Big Creek and nothing more. Now get a haircut you hippie.

2007-02-23T09:13:00.000-05:00

Busy, very busy, but no paddling lately. Green has been dry (or 60% anyway) and no rain. Yonton and I went to the Eternity hole a couple weeks ago and it is sick. Definitely the funnest play spot around and I can't wait to go back. Oh, I now have a channel on broadbandsports.com/user/6279/profile which is basically youtube for sports. As a matter of fact all my videos on there are linked from my youtube account. Wow, amazing story wasn't it?

If anyone liked the movie Shaun of the Dead, the same guys are coming out with a new movie this year called Hot Fuzz. It stars Shaun and Ed from Shaun of the Dead. I absolutely can't wait to see this. Looks hilarious.
Rotten Tomatoes review
and Hot Fuzz offical site

Steve Althaus... you might know him as the 2006 Mustache King, and feeder of donkeys.

Anyway, Steve sent me this pretty funny web site yesterday. http://www.safenow.org/safenow.org . Every time I sit on a plane I look at those safety brochures and laugh my arse off. This site epitomizes that. It's hirarious!

Oh, watch the Riot blog for a post coming soon because we are gonna unveil our most special, secret, stupendous, superlative, sacajawea-istic, silly, stupid, supersonic idea yet. You'll see.

One more story. My wife and son went to the zoo in Greenville SC last week. They saw a monkey there. Here's the photo. Guess what that thing hanging down is? Your first guess is probably wrong. Guess again, you will not like the answer. Haha!

Lovely.

Oh yeah, Boone Baglery is the best place to eat. Clark thinks so too. Later, Spencer

2007-02-13T21:45:00.000-05:00

Today is the turdteenth. It rained some. Maybe water tomorrow.

Recently I decided to put this little video together of all the footage of my kayaking from 2006. I had a great time last year and got to do all kinds of fun paddling. Plus, at the end of the year my wife and I got the best prize ever, our son. I'd say my favorite thing about kayaking, besides coming home to my wife and son, is all the different types of kayaking. If the variety wasn't there I do believe I would get bored. I truly feel like doing it all, creeking, freestyle, surfing, touring, all disciplines, makes a person a better paddler. For example, I know that surf kayaking has made me a much better creek paddler and visa versa. I would strongly encourage any paddler to explore a new type of paddling that you haven't experienced. Surfers should go playboating, creekers should go surfing, playboaters should go creeking! Cats and dogs living together, apples and oranges mingling, everyone getting along, no religion, no politics, no segregation, no fighting. I know what you're thinking, complete and utter chaos for sure. Ah, nevermind all of that. Must've been something I ate.

Click play to watch my video

I credited everyone who shot footage of me in the video except for Caleb Coaplen. He shot one of the clips of me on Linville Gorge. Sorry I missed that Caleb. I kind of have a pet peeve about people not properly crediting photos and video. People usually don't mind holding the camera for a second, but if the footage is used, give them credit. A small favor can help you out a lot and it only takes a second to type someone's name.

Did I mention that I love shorebreak?

With love,

Spencer

2007-02-03T12:41:00.000-05:00

I want to go surf kayaking in big shore break.

2007-01-30T09:15:00.000-05:00

I can't believe we're already through January. Spring has almost sprung, the grass has almost ris, and I'll be driving all over the freakin' place in about a month... dangit! I will say that I have enjoyed my winter hibernation. I've fattened up and am ready to get out and frolic.

Today I wanted to note that I have decided to archive all my videos onto youtube.com. My channel is youtube.com/kayakvideo where currently you can view 42 of my videos from 2005-2007. Subscribe to my channel and you'll receive an automated email each time I add a new video. It's fun! Everyone should try it. Out of all the videos I added last week the most popular so far has been a surf kayaking clip from the fall of 2005 during hurricane Ophelia.

Followed closely by the Green River Narrows fund raising project...

You can also view some of my favorite youtube videos. Lately I've been quite entertained by some Robot Chicken and The Mighty Boosh (thanks to Yonton for the introduction)...

That's all. Good talk.

(my friend Clark was over last week and we had way too much fun with my macbook pro.)
Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

2007-01-23T15:39:00.000-05:00

January twenty-turd. Appropriate for today's topic.

This photograph says it all.

Now why would someone want to sensor healthy pooping positions and clean living? I don't know.

Thanks to Ray for capturing this photo in some magical bathroom out there.

Regarding kayaking... Yonton and I drove to Columbia SC last weekend to paddle at the Saluda. Very nice play spot at the right level. Popup hole it is called. Alan Young is one of the local kids there. He does a really cool move, the "Magic Trick."

I put a little video together about the Magic Trick.

Thanks to Andy Gates and his mom for housing us for a night so we could paddle the next day too!

2007-01-13T08:10:00.000-05:00

I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!

What I meant to say was that I wrote my company name in the snow without using my hands. Work of art.

Don't run with scissors.

Sincerely,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

2007-01-03T12:26:00.000-05:00

January Turd, 2007

Ahh, a new year. Fresh, clean and ready to ruin. So without further hesitation I give you...

the top 10 things that make a whitewater kayaking video, courtesy of Ross and James from Diamond Brand Paddle Sports in Asheville NC. (Ross and James are self proclaimed kayak video experts and grade A wise guys.)

So, top 10 things that make kayak videos good or stupid or whatever...
1. Helicopters
2. Locals Dancing with Sticks
3. Scooter Shuttles
4. some sort of driving montage
5. Kid in a helmet way too big for them, preferably a local
6. Goats, Donkeys and Hippos
7. Broke Down Shuttle Vehicle Montage
8. Taxing portage sequence
9. Random Police officers and/or Local law enforcement
10. Some guy in a Pro-Tec going off a 50 upside down (carnage section)
James went as a broken kayak for Haloween...

Ross went as a guy on a whiskey wagon...

Don't run with scissors.

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

2006-12-30T14:37:00.000-05:00

I've never had a new year's resolution. Though, over the past couple years I believe I have resolved to read more books. Never have been much of a reader. Then out of nowhere, maybe last year sometime, I had a spark of interest. Maybe it has something to do with reading the right books, interesting ones, that you want to read, instead of having school reading assignments shoved down your throat. To this day I still have anxiety over school, and it's been twelve years since I've attended college. Attended mind you, not completed. The point of the matter is that I have read two books in particular this year that really, honestly, truly inspired me.
First, HAWK, occupation: skateboarder, by Tony Hawk

Second, THE MUTT, how to skateboard and not kill yourself, by Rodney Mullen

Growing up as a skater, I've been a fan of these two fellas for years and have seen their progression on videos and magazines all along. In 1987 and '89 I even had the pleasure of meeting Rodney Mullen who was an incredibly kind and humble person.

Everyone knows who Tony Hawk is and every skater, at least, knows who Rodney Mullen is. Anyone can see skateboarding on tv these days and make the obvious observation that skaters (at least the guys seen on tv) are coordinated, talented and daring individuals. And I think that most people (non-skaters) can appreciate the talents of skateboarders. Though not everyone can appreciate and respect what skating has done for other alternative sports such as snowboarding, skiing, surfing and lo and behold, KAYAKING! That's right, kayaking, just like other "extreme sports" in many ways follows in the footsteps of skating. For example, did you think that the blunt was a kayaking move? Well, yeah it is, but it was a skating trick long before. The shove-it, also a skateboard trick, and a much harder one than the kayaking version I might add. I think Bob McDonough invented the kayak version of the McTwist in the early nineties, well after Mike McGill invented the McTwist on a skateboard. And shamefully, the McNasty, which is not a skateboard trick at all, but the name is obviously biting on the McTwist. I think this is by far the coolest trick of the lot in a kayak but the McGayest name. One of the more simple tricks that is the foundation of most all skate tricks and, whether you realize or not, is also the foundation of most kayak tricks, the OLLIE.
I learned to ollie on my skateboard long before I kayaked. I never imagined I would do apply it to a water sport. My friend Chris Miller took this photo of me skating this summer in Salida CO doing an ollie backside 180 heel flip.

The physics of the kayak ollie are the same as that of a skateboard ollie and you may thank Mr Rodney Mullen for discovering the flat ground ollie on a skateboard in the late 1970s. It's hard to believe, but true, that kayaking tricks which are done today trace back to a 1970s, Floridian, teenage skater, experimenting with tricks in his garage. Simply put, an ollie is a quick slap down on the tail of a board or boat followed by a forward weight shift, causing lift and AIR. Like in skating, most every trick in kayaking (not including cartwheel style tricks) is initiated with an ollie. You ollie into blunts, back blunts, panams, helixes, mcnastys, and sometimes loops.
Below is a video of skateboard ollies and kayak ollies. Watch how the board ollies compared to the boat. It's doing the same thing to achieve air. The nose pops up then the weight of the rider shifts forward to bring up the tail.

The ollie thing is quite a tangent from my original point but shows how much skating has influenced kayaking. To get back to the books, I would highly recommend these two reads to any kayaker, especially those who aspire to be better, to compete, to go pro, to enjoy their sport, to push the limits, to have fun! There's not much more inspiring to me than the fact that Tony Hawk, in his mid-30s, landed his first 900 spin, a trick he had been trying for thirteen years. That's enough to make someone go crazy. Thirteen freakin' years. HAWK is inspring in so many ways aside from the 900 story.

THE MUTT, by Rodney Mullen, talks about his upbringing and the struggles of being able to do what he loved most, skating, despite objections from his somewhat autocratic father. He describes his methods of learning and inventing moves by himself and becoming the best in the world. As well, he humbly describes the fortune of being sponsored at a very young age and eventually becoming one of skateboarding's leading professionals, both as an athlete and a business person.

Both of these books really hit home for me, one, because I can relate as a skater, and two, I draw a parallel between their experiences and my own as industry professionals. I hope kayaking can one day have the successes that skateboarding has had in recent years. For sure it has shared the struggles that the skateboarding industry had during the '80s and '90s.

HAWK and The MUTT are available at most books stores and online.

Happy new year.

Spencer Cooke & Mason

Effort Inc.

2006-12-26T09:17:00.000-05:00

I skipped out on the December twenty-turd blog post so here's one on the twenty-sexth.

Happy holidays to everyone. First, I wanted to thank Colin Kemp in Reno NV for hosting what was probably the last Enter The Donkey premiere. Sounds like they had a big boater holiday party with lots of food and friends. Colin said there were four or five screens with ETD and some other kayaking films.

Recently I launched the first of a new series of online kayaking videos by Effort.tv - Mion Footwear will be the presenting sponsor of these videos from now on. Mion is a new shoe company that is completely committed to making footwear for the amphibious athlete and doing it in the most environmentally friendly way as possible. Check them out at www.MionFootwear.com . Meanwhile, here's the first video presented by Mion...
click here to see Lower Elk video!

December 1st was a great day! I made a really fun trip down the Toxaway River with some great friends, including long time paddling buddy, Brad Kee. Click Kee's picture below to check out a bunch of photos from our day on the creek.

If you looked through the Toxaway photo gallery there is a photo of Chris Gragtmans filming Dylan Bruce at Minigizer rapid. I was tooling around with the photo and came up with this design for a possible t-shirt. I wonder what people would think of this? The green would be the t-shirt color and the screen would be black/white/grey.

This summer I shot some video of a crazy looking beetle running across my driveway. I put it up on my youtube channel, which is youtube.com/kayakvideo Enjoy, it's pretty funny.

Lastly, in an effort to keep folks up to date with the goings on of the Riot kayak team we have put up a google calendar that can be accessed through the Riot Blog , in the links section on the side. We've listed events, team members who will be present, and links to those event's web sites.

That's enough. Have a happy Yule. Eat a yule log if you have one. Heck, throw one in the fireplace or if you get the urge drop a yule log. Sometimes you have to.

2006-12-13T11:08:00.000-05:00

I got this email from someone named Saad Khadri who allegedly thinks I'm his "Dear" and who has also created some incredible combo words like "knowsomebody." I never knew you could do that and get away with it. Anyway, I was amused. Letter below...

Dear,

This letter might surprise you because we have not met neither in person nor by correspondence. But I believe it is one day that you get to knowsomebody either in physical or through correspondence.
Linville Gorge is fun. Caleb and Jeb think so.

I am Saad Khadri I have a proposal to make, that might be of interest to you. I am in possession of a large sum of money (US$18,000,000.00)Eighteen Million USDollars)The money was inherited from my late father who was the Chairman of the Sierra Leone Gold and diamond Mining Corporation during the Sierra Leonian War when Major Johnny Paul Koromah was the country's president.
Babel Tower is the first rapid. It's fun.

The money is of no criminal origin as it was largely realized from black market sale of alluvial gold dust during the war.The money has been deposited in a Bank here in Abidjan, Cote d'Ivoire (Ivory Coast).I now want to transfer this money abroad and invest it in profitable ventures,as the time is now ripe for such move.
This one has a nasty undercut on both sides. Most of the rapids out there do.

WHAT I ASK YOU TO DO:

1.Firstly to assist me to transfer this money to any stable country abroad.2.To assist me invest the money in profitable ventures in your country or any other suitable country where you have good connections.3 To help re-locate to the suggested country.4 To manage the money in a profitable manner preferably a joint venture deal with your company.
Cave Rapid has the most vertical drop of any rapid out there and is probably the easiest rapid on the Linville.

For your assistance you will get 25% of the total amount Upon your reques I will give you further details of the plans and tell you more about my self but you must treat as highly confidential for my security.
Then there's a ton of other rapids out there. Here are a couple.

Regards.
Saad Khadri
Buy an Effort t-shirt for your very special someone this holiday.

2006-12-03T00:08:00.000-05:00

Here's a December Turd for you. Happy holidays.

Recently I was going through some old photos and came across these, from my first real whitewater paddling trip. This is summer of 1993 at the Nantahala.

My parents got me this Dagger canoe as a high school graduation present. I had originally wanted the boat to fish out of on the New River. Little did I know how much fun it was going to be just to paddle it.

In the photo below, from left to right is Chris Copenhaver, myself and my father, Johnny. Chris sold the boat to my folks in addition to introducing me to several creeks and rivers when I first started. He was also a teacher and coach at my high school, which is how I got to know him. What an incredible guy to whom I owe many thanks.

My Dad had always talked about canoe racing on the Nantahala. In 1975 he and his friend Jimmy Cottrell were the Southeastern US canoe champions. The race was held on the Nanty and they won in an 18'6" Moore, fiberglass canoe. Before 1993 whitewater paddling, canoeing and the mighty Nantahala were all legendary, ficticious even, to me (though I had seen photos). This particular photo was taken during the Southeastern Nationals in July of 1975. They were to compete in the Nationals in mid-August but my birth intervened. Sorry Daddy!

Chris, my Dad and I headed down to the Nantahala for an intro to whitewater weekend. My Dad smoked a cigar the whole way down the river. We flipped two or three times and swam but he never lost the cigar. Now that's commitment. Notice how cozy and agreeable that horse collar pfd looks on him. It's as if he's right back in 1975.

Chris paddled one of the hottest kayaks out at the time, Dagger Response, milk jug color.

After some coaching from Chris, my Dad and I finally figured out how to front surf that 16' canoe.

Of course, Lesser Wesser falls was the big hoorah at the end. We went right through, no problem.

I even learned how to side surf that day. What a bizarre concept at the time.

My Dad and I were amazed at these "pop-up" things Chris was able to do in the falls.

Thanks so much to my Father and Chris for the best paddling trip of my life. Notice the gloves, important for canoeing the Nanty in the summertime.

Yesterday I paddled the Toxaway with some of my best friends. As my Dad noted recently, It is truly amazing how far the sport has come in 13 years.

Later,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

2006-11-30T00:00:00.000-05:00

November Turdieth! Actually, today is Black November Turdieth, the biggest shopping day of the year!

Nah, in reality, today is "moron of the year day." I got all your votes and the results are in!
Regis and Kelly's stupid asses won! Congrats to them on being crowned morons.

It was a toss up between them and George Bush but Regis and Kelly have actually said more stupid, superficial, moronic things... so they won. What does this have to do with anything at all? I have no idea. All I know is that those numbnut, a-holes don't deserve their own tv show, and neither does George Bush. Actually Gorge Bush could probably have a pretty funny tv show, like a huntin' or oil drillin' show. Or it could be like a reality show where George Bush travels cross country in an RV with a completely incompatible co-star, like... like... ahhh... It would have to be someone who was of another ethnicity, preferably gay, perhaps Hindu, vegan and female. I'm not sure who that would be but it would be one heck of a good show fo sho. Maybe when they got across country, to Texas of course, George could show her how to drill some erl, real proper like. Then they could go out and celebrate with a steak dinner at Western Sizzlin'. The end.

Next song!

Today's regular programming has been cancelled and will never be shown again.

The real reason I'm writing is this... I have a new Effort Inc T-Shirt for sale featuring Go Left rapid from the Green River Narrows. The words at the top read Paddle Video Photo, which is exatly what is going on in the photo. It's a photo of me filming Brian Miller paddling. Here's what it looks like:

Click Here to visit the Effort.tv web store where you can purchase the shirt.

The T-Shirt design relates the business and workings of Effort Inc and was inspired by the below photo sequence, which has a story, more photos and video to go along with it. That is all in a previous blog post .

Good day,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

2006-11-23T00:44:00.000-05:00

November twentyturd - Today is Effort.tv's annual photo issue. Please enjoy some of my favorite photos from the past year.

Click the image below to visit the '05-'06 Photo Annual

Enter The Donkey is to have its Southwestern premiere in Nevada on December 9th.

Hosted by good buddy Colin Kemp, of Jackson Kayak, at the Patagonia distribution center
6-11 PM and it's a pot luck dinner, byob (for infants that means bring your own breast milk)
For questions please contact colin@jacksonkayak.com
Thanks Colin!

NEWS from h2o audio - Two new products: On 12/01 they will start shipping the waterproof housing for the 2nd generation iPod Nano as well as a new, less expensive Nano housing, the Outdoor Series.
Click the logo to visit h2o audio's web site

Here is the all new h2o audio Outdoor Series iPod Nano housing. It very easily fits both the 1st and 2nd generation iPod Nanos. The retail price on this little jewel is $39.95, available at your finer outdoor shopping venues such as Diamond Brand Outdoors, Great Outdoor Provision Company, NOC and more.

Some key points to know about the h2o audio Outdoor Series iPod Nano housing:
1) It is a rugged case that includes belt clip and sport armband for $ 39.99 MSRP
2) Fits BOTH nano models (1st and 2nd gen.)
3) For outdoor enthusiasts who are not necessarily looking to use their iPod in the water, but want to take it into the elements, this is the product for them.
4) The Outdoor Series housing is not meant for in-water use like the h2o audio series, waterproof housings. Instead it is more of a light duty housing, suitable for backpacking, camping, cycling, running or everyday iPod use. We'll call it element resistant rather than waterproof or water resistant.
5) The Outdoor Series housing does have the patented Commander™ Scroll Wheel function, allowing its user to control every function of the iPod from the outside of the case.

6) To install your iPod Nano into the housing simply slide the locking mechanisms on the sides of the case into the upward, open position. Lift the easy to open lid.

7) If using a 1st gen iPod Nano you will lift and remove the plastic shim provided in the case. If using a 2nd gen iPod Nano, which is thinner, leave the plastic shim in place. Then, lay the ipod face up in the case.

8) Then close the case making sure the silicone seal is in place and that it is free of debris. Take a look at the bottom of the housing. You will see two silicone caps, one for the iPod Dock connector or charger and one for a headphone jack.

9) Upon opening these caps you will see that you are unable to allow liquid or debris to make contact with these areas while the iPod is exposed, though the remainder of the iPod is still fully protected. You may connect your charger, dock connector and/or headphone jack.

10) Begin charging and/or listening to your iPod while it is in the Outdoor Series housing. You may close either one of the silicone caps while using the other if you like.

11) The Outdoor Series housing comes with a belt clip allowing the housing to be attached almost anywhere. It also comes with a neoprene, sport armband.

12) The Outdoor Series housing fits nicely to an aftermarket, bicycle, handlebar mount.

As far as paddling goes, I definitely wouldn't paddle with this housing, but I think the Outdoor Series housing has an application for paddlers. That application is hiking. There are plenty of rivers where you have to hike for quite sometime, either to or from the water, where a shock and element resistant housing would be great but you don't really need the waterproof, submersible housing. Here in the Southeast the Linville, Toxaway, Raven Fork, Big Creek and Horsepasture are just a few examples of runs that have hikes long enough to listen to your iPod.
Click the logo to visit h2o audio's web site

Coming on November Turdieth is the Panama Surf Kayak Adventure with Drew Hayes and Ray Cotton. It should be really funny and entertaining.

Happy Turkey Sack,

Spencer Cooke, Effort Inc.

2006-11-13T16:31:00.000-05:00

November Turdteenth News - Kayak Action Figures!

Now available from Effort.tv, your favorite rafting action figures from the DVD, "Enter The Donkey"

We are proud to announce our first five of a complete line of action figure toys based on characters from the fictitious love story, "Enter the Donkey." Buy them all now before supplies run out! Your kids will love them. They make great Thanksgiving or St Patrick's Day presents. Each figure even comes with it's own signature model boat.

Characters include:

Caleb Coaplen - Enter The Donkey's most conflicted and complex character. A must have.

Chris Gragtmans - Buy this special edition Gragtmans while our inventory lasts. This character has just run the 50 foot Elk River Falls, and it even surfs gigantic waves!

The Joey Hall figure is a perfect morale booster for kids who get picked on a great deal. A couple days with the Joey figure and you'll automatically absorb the behavior of a male donkey, guaranteed.

FELIPE is spelled in upper case letters to imply the importance of the professional paddler nickname. Get the FELIPE action figure and earn a coupon towards the FELIPE Sit-On-Top action figure, available soon.

Spencer Cooke's action figure makes a popular toilet ornament. Float it right beside your own floater!

Click below to buy your very own Enter The Donkey action figure today.

Enter The Donkey action figure owners will receive a free membership to the ETD fan club. Members will receive exclusive advice from professional paddlers like Heehaw Jones of Enter The Donkey fame. Here's a special tip from Heehaw himself:

"How To Become A Professional Kayaker"
1. Always refer to yourself as a pro kayaker in front of other kayakers. If you own a video or still camera you may automatically qualify as a professional photographer due to your pro kayaking status.
2. Have a business card that titles you as a pro kayaker and whatever else you claim to be professional at.
3. Make sure and have a web site that has your name in the URL. Example: www.HeehawJones.com
4. Make sure to say "keepin' it real" in reference to what you're doing for the sport of kayaking, especially if you're caucasian.
5. Give yourself a nickname or have people call you by your initials. "Yo, what's up KC?" "Just keepin' it real HJ! Did you see the size of that Donkey Choke I just did?"
6. Describe exceptional moves you did in your kayak as "huge," "big," "biggest I've ever seen," "incredible" or "awesome."
7. Refer to yourself in the third person, always, in particular on your web site, internet forums, magazine articles and videos. "KC likes paddling with HJ because HJ respects the skills of KC. Did you see the huge aerial KC just did?"
8. Always train. Pro kayakers don't paddle for fun. If they paddle, regardless of when or where, it's TRAINING. Some pro paddlers go through an entire career without ever competing but you can rest assured that they are fully trained.
9. Have a toy action figure in your likeness.
10. Drink lots of red bull.

Do all this stuff and you might qualify for pro kayaker status. If you fail you should probably quit kayaking.

Learn more about Enter The Donkey and buy the DVD at www.EnterTheDonkey.com"

2006-11-03T14:59:00.000-05:00

November Turd News at Effort.tv

My wife and I got a brand new donkey on Nov 1st, Mason Spencer Cooke. We love him very much and hope to take him kayaking one day if he wants to go.

I don't think I'll make it to the Green race tomorrow but I wish all my friends good luck and a good time. See you on the water soon.

Later,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

2006-10-30T20:31:00.000-05:00

Welcome to Effort.tv news on October Turdieth,

Who said this news had to be about kayaking. That's boring. New topic. Tomorrow is Halloween, therefore I recommend two horror moives to rent for this event:

1) "Shaun of the Dead" Released in 2004

I could watch this movie time and time again and not get sick of it. It is very British and very funny. Imagine a downright kneeslapping, heehawwing "Dawn of The Dead" and this is it. You may even recognize two of the most popular cast members from "The Office" (British version), Dawn and Tim.
Here's a link to the official UK "Shaun of the Dead" site. It has a hilarious video game you can play where you throw vinyl records at zombies, like in the movie. I played this thing for like 15 minutes before I got tired of it. Actually I didn't get tired of it. Currently I don't own a copy of this movie but I plan to.

2) "Army of Darkness" Released in 1992, starring Bruce Campbell

I couldn't really find any good sites about Army of Darkness but here's one that has a bunch of stuff about all the Evil Dead movies, which Army of Darkness is one of. geocities.com/evildeadpage
I do own this movie on VHS and when it came out on DVD I bought that too. Needless to say I've seen it a handful of times. My wife is not too fond of this flick but believe me it's completely and totally hilarious and rondiculous. You just can't get sick of it. Bruce Campbell plays the character, Ash, who is an S-Mart (like Kmart) employee who gets sucked into this medieval dimension where the "Deadites" are taking over. He uses his modern smarts, and smartassness, to defeat the Deadites and win the respect of the common folk.

I know I said two movies but I just thought of another one.
3) "Bubba Ho-Tep" Released in 2002, also starring Bruce Campbell, of Evil Dead/Army of Darkness fame.

In this movie Bruce plays the part of Elvis Presley, old and decrepit and in a nursing home. Nobody believes that he is actually Elvis. The "horror" part of this movie is a mummy that invades the nursing home. It's pretty funny. I own this DVD as well and am particularly keen on it, not because it is really funny and Bruce Campbell plays a great role, but because two great friends of mine were involved in the making of this film. One of my best and dearest friends, who I've known since elementary school, Avery Taylor, was a picture model in the film. That means that he is in a photograph in the film. Another friend, Danny Vecchione, who I met in high school and went to art school with at VCU in Richmond VA, was the production designer on this film. That means he designed the set. Originally I bought the DVD just to support my friends and was pleasantly surprised with how much I enjoyed the movie.
The official web site is bubbahotep.com

All this horror movie talks brings us full circle, back to kayaking. Why? Because the sequel to "Enter The Donkey"...

Released in 2006 by Effort Inc, Catalyst Media and Deadman Productions might bear the title, "Night of the Living Donkeys." Right now it's just something we're tossing around the office but maybe, just maybe we'll call it that. We will need some zombies to fly out of the water at the bottom of rapids and at play spots. We're trying to work out that minor detail.

Speaking of horror videos, I have updated the video gallery archives on Effort.tv. Somehow I forgot to do that for the past five months but it's all there now. Here's the page effort.tv/videogallerykayakarchives.htm including a brand new video I just put up on the Linville Gorge.

Further, Effort.tv will be featuring a Panama surf kayaking trip with Ray Cotton and Drew Hayes later in November. Ray and Drew left two days ago for a twelve day surf adventure. The surf report was excellent and they took Effort Inc's video camera and telephoto lens. They'll be doing a full blog report like we did about our
Ecuador surf trips, complete with photos, video and without a doubt, moronic behavior.

See you on the turd of November,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

ps. Here's my Halloween costume. I'm dressed as Chubbs from Happy Gilmore. Pictured at the end of my fingers is Travis McDowell (co-star of Enter The Donkey. You might notice him licking something.),who is dressed as a librarian.

2006-10-23T14:19:00.000-04:00

October twenty-turd News

The Mustache contest was featured in Paddler Magazine's Kayak Magazine this summer. Way to go Steve Althaus!

Oddly though, Effort.tv was not credited with any of it. Haha! To see all the work that Effort.tv did not do on this event please visit the Mustache Link!

On a similar note Eugene Buchanan, formerly of Paddler Magazine, has resigned and started his own publication to be released in Spring '07 called Paddling Life. It is to be a bi-monthly magazine and they are doing a bi-annual Whitewater Life. Here's the link to their site. Paddling Life

I added a new dealer profile for Old Town Outfitters. They are based in Rock Hill, SC, close to Charlotte, NC. Rock Hill is like if you're heading from Charlotte towards Carowinds. Basically Old Town Outfitters is like Carowinds but more fun. Here's the link to their profile Old Town Outfitters and a photo of some of the dudes who work there.

Recently I traveled to Georgia on a sales trip. Not too many signs make me pull over and take a picture but this one did. Now that is a place that I would not go to have my eyes checked. Nothing more needs to be said.

Afterwards we had birthday cake and Yonton gave me a high-five.

The END.

2006-10-15T13:45:00.000-04:00

Green River Video Project Completed - $10,000 donated to the Green River Access Fund

It's that special time of year! No, not Halloween, not Christmas, not Flag Day! Green Race Day is rapidly approaching and love is in the air! With all the excitement abound I figured it would be cool to share something special.

Click HERE to watch the video.

Here are the three of us, Mr Greenhagen, Brian and myself, working on our first day of shooting, just below Go Left.

photo courtesty of Abhay Patel

This spring, a long time paddling friend of mine, Brian Miller, called me up with an exciting proposition, to get paid for filming him on the Green River Narrows for a couple days. He didn't have to twist my arm much to say the least. Only after Brian explained the full scope of the project did I truly feel like this was a job that meant more than just paddling and filming, two things I do all the time. A recent article in Canoe & Kayak details the project and features comments from Brian MIller. To preface that article I wanted to briefly explain the project. Zimmer, Inc is the largest orthopedic device company in the world. They were looking for exciting, compelling, whitewater video footage with which to metaphorically relate the sales of their products. They used comparisons of all classes of whitewater with orthopedic sales to produce a motivational video for their employees worldwide. The video features none other than former C1 and OC1 National and World Champion, Brian Miller. Brian is a real ham in front of the camera and he's smooth like butter on the water, making him the perfect man for this job. Through Brian's connections in his profession as a Pharmaceutical Rep he was able to connect the three of us, Zimmer, himself and myself, to execute this project. An outdoor lover himself, Mr. Richard Greenhagen from Zimmer, was so inspried by our precious paddling resourse that he compassionately donated $10,000 to the Green River Access Fund in memory of Daniel DeLaVergne.
Click here to read the full article at Canoe & Kayak .

We express gratitude to our great pal, Ray Cotton, for carrying my still camera down the river and shooting some shots for us. As well, Brian's friend, Abhay Patel, hiked into the Narrows with Mr Richard Greenhagen and took photos. Thanks again and again to Mr Greenhagen himself for the generous donation to the Green River fund. I am very proud and honored to have been involved in such a meaningful project. It's not often that I get such an opportunity.

I'm filming atop the rock as Brian Goes Left.

Photo taken by Ray Cotton

Regarding the video: What you will download here is not the actual video produced by Zimmer, Inc, which was the purpose of this project to begin with. This is simply a highlight reel of all the filming we did in three full days on the water. Footage includes helmet-cam and every other angle we could get of those Green River rapids we all love so much. In an effort to give a realistic portrayal of the paddling that actually went on, the video shows the good lines and the crashes, including a crash of mine at Nutcracker. Oops. If you know the Green you will see that the rapids are edited in order, top to bottom. Please enjoy the video and make sure to thank and support the companies who supported this project: Liquidlogic, Astral, Aquabound, IR, Outdoor Sports Marketing and Shred Ready.

To read the full article about this project go to

They have posted some nice comments from Brian and more facts about the video shoot.

Meanwhile, take a look at some more photos from our work on the river. Photos were taken by Ray Cotton and Abhay Patel.

Filming Brian at Zwick's Back Ender.

Photo taken by Ray Cotton

Meet Mr. Richard Greenhagen, loving his experience down in the narrows.

Photo courtesy Abhay Patel

Mr Greenhagen meets us at the bottom of Scream Machine. He was blown away by the awe-inspiring sights of the gorge and size of the rapids.

Photos courtesy Abhay Patel

Brian ran Go Left & Die perfectly three out of four times. Here was one of the beautiful runs where he lays out on a cross bow stroke as he lines up for the slot. The first shot of that sequence reminds me of a bottom turn in the surf. Absolutely beautiful body position and boat control.

Here Brian flies like a bird off Gorilla.

Photo courtesy Abhay Patel

Click HERE to watch the video.

To read the full article about this project go to

See you out there,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

2006-10-13T17:53:00.000-04:00

Today is October Turdteenth. Thirteenth if you don't speak Irish. It's a special day. Why, you might ask. Because... two of my very good friends, who you may also know, are having a birthday today and I thought they deserved some humiliation.

Rion Smith and Don Hege ladies and gents. Happy Birthday to both you guys!

Don Hege, the guy who really got me going in the paddle sport business. I owe a lot to him. These days Don works at Great Outdoor Provision Co. in Winston Salem NC. When I first met Don he owned a shop in Winston called Whitewater Destinations, where I first learned about Riot Kayaks. Whitewater Destinations was my first sponsor, back in 1997, and consequently they were the first Riot Kayaks dealer in the US. Don gave me a Riot Hammer and told me to spread the word about Riot and his shop. Well, Don ended up hooking me up with Riot and I became their sales rep in the Southeast. A few years later Don sold his shop to Great Outdoor Provision and here we are now. If you ever get a chance to meet Don you should feel priveleged to do so. He is to me one of the true icons of paddle sports. If you know him the way I do you know what I mean.

Here is a recent photo of Don hanging out at GOPC.

This is a photo of me in my first Riot Hammer, given to me by Don. Watauga Falls, high water, 1997.

Same boat again. My first Green Race, Gorilla, November, 1997. I got 11th place out of around 30 racers. I didn't even know the lines. I must have zig-zagged all the way down the river. Haha!

Rion Smith is one of my best friends in the universe. He is important to me in so many ways, always as a friend and in business. Rion started as a paddle sports sales rep around the same time I did. We met in October, 1997 at the Wind-N-Sea Wave Blast, mine and his first surf kayaking competition. Neither of us has ever grown tired of kayak surfing. In fact that's what we love to do together best.

In 2000 Rion hired me as a sales rep in his rep group, Outdoor Sports Marketing, where I worked for two years. If I had to be employeed by someone and not run my own business, I could not imagine a better work situation. Rion is the best boss you could imagine. In those two years Rion allowed me to co-start my own business with Daniel DeLaVergne, which became Penstock Productions. So in many ways Rion enabled the startup of Penstock and LVM by allowing me the time and freedom during my employment at OSM. I could ramble on and on about how great this guy is, but that's a little history of our relationship. Rion truly is my brother from another mother. I should also mention that this was Rion's turdyturd birthday.

Here is Rion chillin in a hammock on our Ecuador surf trip last winter.

I'm outta here. Hopefully I'll be talking to you on the twentyturd. I have some good stuff to post here at that time.

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

2006-10-05T22:43:00.000-04:00

Surf Kayaker, Charles Salters sizes up the shore break at Cape Hatteras before his semi-finals heat in the 2006 US National Surf Kayaking Championships.

September was a great month for me. I spent most of it traveling throughout my sales rep territory to visit retail stores. This time of year is always a busy road time for paddle sport reps. Preseason orders are normally due by the end of Sept, so everyone scrambles about like cockroaches trying to gobble up all the bread crumbs. My fall travels this year started with a welcome stop at Cape Hatteras, NC where the 2006 National Surf Kayaking Championships were under way. I was excited to come away with a National Title in the International Class.

Dave Johnston, from Santa Cruz CA, is always a contender in HP and IC. He did walk away with the HP National Title but I was able to edge him out in the IC finals. He took second, Joey Hall 3rd, Ross Fulcher 4th. Dave was in the first semi-finals heat of the day and pretty much set the standard for what was going to have to be done to win in head high beach break. Lip moves into six inches of water. Some boats were broken. Here is Dave slashing the lip on one of his rides.

Dave is shown here popping a floater in the HP class.

In case you have had no formal introduction or education regarding surf kayaking, there are two separate divisions of competition, International Class (IC) and High Performance (HP). Compared to stand up or board surfing, basically IC is long board and HP is short board but in kayaking there is little or no difference in the way the boat/board is surfed. You can see on the video that the long boats are able to throw radical moves just like the shorties. So I won the IC class at nationals. I compete in both but just happened to do best in IC at this event. My chosen craft is HP. I have a 6'8" boat, the Charger, that I normally surf. The IC boats are 10'. Most play boaters would never imagine that you could throw a helix or a huge blunt in a 10 foot boat, but with the IC boats it is quite possible. Both boats are equally fun and challenging in their own ways. Anyway, I hope that fills you in a little better if you were unaware.

Russ Buskirk paddles out through shore break in the IC class.

If you haven't already had a chance to see the highlight video from the Nationals, here it is again.
See the 2006 Nationals VIDEO Quicktime Format

After Nationals I hightailed it up to the DC area for some more retail store visits. Good buddy, Joey Hall, went with me and it was great having his company. Being on the road can get so boring when you're alone. After DC we spent a day up on the New Jersey Coast with another pal of ours, Drew Hayes. He showed us his local surf break where we were lucky to get a couple nice sessions before heading back south.
These were a couple shots Joey took of me in NJ.

Joey and I headed to Richmond VA afterwards for a Riot demo day with Appomattox River Co. Blog post to come at the Riot blog soon.

I haven't mentioned throughout all this that my vehicle has been out of commission. My very good man, Rion Smith, loaned me his truck for a month to do all my necessary road time. After returning that to him I thought I was getting my truck back but the repair had been delayed. Mike Byer Auto and Truck Repair is where I have my vehicle worked on in Asheville NC. I highly recommend these folks for auto work. They are honest, straight shooters and they do excellent, thorough work, which is way more than I can say for some other auto establishments in town. Anway, since my truck is not repaired yet, the good folks at Mike Byer loaned me, well, their loaner. The loaner is a Nissan Sentra with quite possibly the best personalized plates I've ever come across, no pun intended. It reads MBATR2, which obviously means Mike Byer Auto and Truck Repair... or does it? You can allow your imagination to do the rest on this one. I absolutely had to have my picture taken with this beauty. Thanks Mike Byer!

Come back here and visit soon. I have a big blog post to put up regarding a Green River fund raiser that Brian Miller and I did this summer. Lots of photos, words and video will be included.

Later,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

2006-10-03T00:14:00.000-04:00

Welcome!

All the Effort.tv news has been moved over to this blog. This will be easier to update and is certainly better for archiving all the old posts. I have consolidated all the news since the site launch as well as a couple significant blog posts from last year's Ecuador surf kayaking trips, etc... Dig through the archives if you want to see about those trips.

As I mentioned in the last post I truly do want to do my site updates on the turds. Meaning the turd, turdteenth, twentyturd and turdieth. Maybe even the turdyfirst. With that in mind, I just may not be able to wait for the turd on some of these posts, so you could be surprised to find updates here that are not on the turds. After all, you shouldn't force your turds... they should come naturally.

Sometimes I think I kid around too much. Then later on when I need you to take me seriously you may just think I'm joking. Okay, from now on I'm being totally serious.

Maybe.

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

2006-09-23T00:00:00.000-04:00

September twentyturd, 2006

Effort.tv Announces today, Sept. twentyturd that we will be doing all our future updates, starting today, every turd, on the turd. So come back here for the latest on the turd, the turdteenth, the twentyturd and the turdieth. This stunning concept inspired by the Irish. Many tanks to the Irish.

In other news we have posted an exciting profile on your favorite retail store, NOC.

Please visit this link to read about your good people at the Nantahala. LINK...

Effort.tv and Deadman Productions are proud to announce that the Drug Free Lifestyle t-shirts have sold out. The only chance to still get one of these popular shirts is to buy it from NOC or the US National Whitewater Center retail stores. They do have some in stock.

We will be coming out with some new designs, hopefully in time for the holidays. Check the Effort.tv store at that time.

In even more news, I am glad to announce that Enter The Donkey, the kayaking DVD, is nearly out of stock after selling close to 1000 copies. We are not sure exactly what we are going to do about making more copies. There are around 200 left that will hopefully last us through October. After that we will decide whether or not to reduplicate the DVD. Although we will proudly be making at 5% donation of our sales to the Green River Access Fund and the Eastern Surf Kayaking Assocation.

ENTER the DONKEY.

Lastly, I was honored to have become a National Champion last weekend at the US National Surf Kayaking Championships at the Outer Banks on North Carolina. I won 1st place in the International Class as well as a second place, National Champion Runner Up, in the K1 class. I will be posting video highlights here soon and there will be blog posts regarding the event on Riot's blog and the ESKA web site. Until then keep your pants on.

Hugs and kisses,

Spencer Cooke, Effort.tv

2006-08-10T23:58:00.000-04:00

Ladies and Gents, Garrett Bryant is a visionary and an artist. This is why:

Roses are red,

Violets are blue

Sugar is sweet,

Elephant shoe.

2006-08-08T23:57:00.000-04:00

Three hilarious new voice mails from wacky dudes!

1) Israel Putnam calls begging to have his almost nude photo taken off the Mustache Contest web page... Israel MP3

2) Mefford & Yonton leave me a message regarding going to the river... MefYon MP3

3) Mefford steams about the common mispronunciation of his name... Medford MP3

&

New from H2O Audio, August, 2006

Waterproof housings and headphones for iPod Nano, Shuffle & 5G (video)

2006-07-23T23:56:00.000-04:00

July Twenty Turd, 2006

West coast ripper, surf kayaker, Vince Shay, has launched a really cool new surf kayak web site.

Check it out Paddle Surfers United

In other news, Enter the Donkey had its world premiere in Columbia, SC. We had about 35 people. Big thanks to Ronnie Pender and the Saluda Boyz. It was an awesome way to kick off the the video. One attendee posted their thoughts on boatertalk. Read it. More premiere dates are at...

Lastly, we are now selling the Mission Epicocity DVD

Click here to watch the trailer

at the Effort.tv web store. We are really glad to be offering a box set of Mission EP and Enter the Donkey for $35. Chris Gragtmans and myself are honored to be featured in Mission Epicocity and we encourage everyone to see it. It's a killer video and a great price, $24.95.

2006-07-20T23:54:00.000-04:00

New Enter the Donkey Premiere dates have been added as well as some new online discussions.

Later on...

2006-07-11T16:07:00.000-04:00

This a big day here at Effort.tv

I have just returned from a month in Colorado and Wyoming with the Academy of Huge Experiences, traveling with trip co-leader, Jason Aytes, and nine of the coolest 15-17 year old paddlers I could imagine. It was a real privelege to travel with those guys. Please take a moment to check out our trip blogs if you have a second. http://gohuge.blogspot.com

And check out Huge Experiences web site to learn more about their program.

click HERE

While in Colorado we attended the US National Freestyle Kayak Championships, held at the Salida play park. I myself was just shy of making finals but decided to film it nonetheless. I must say that this was bar none, the most impressive hole competition I've ever seen, and the hardest competitive field I've seen. These are highlight videos I put together of the men's pro finals. They are listed in order of how the person placed in nationals. Enjoy and learn.

(some of these links may not work now since i had to take some of the files offline. i needed the space.)
1st Place Stephen Wright

2nd Place Bryan Kirk

3rd Place Jimmy Blakeney

4th Place John Myer

5th Place Clay Wright

6th Place Todd Baker

7th Place Jed Selby

8th Place Greg Parker

9th Place Dustin Urban

10th Place Seth Chapel

11th Place Andre Spino-Smith

If you can't tell from the video it takes an incredible amount of concentration and precision to be able to throw all the moves that are being done in a one minute ride. I have the women's rides as well but have been unable to edit those yet. I will put those up too.

Now the big news. The Effort.tv store

is finally functional and is selling the new kayak DVD, ENTER the DONKEY.

CLICK HERE to learn all there is to know about the video and buy it for the very low price of $14.99.

Additionally, Effort.tv and Deadman Productions have put our new DRUG FREE LIFESTYLE t-shirt on sale at the online store.

2006-06-10T16:05:00.000-04:00

The Mustache contest is officially over and we have announced our winners. Feast your eyes on our esteemed hair growing athletes. Roger from IR sent in a photo of his cool mustache t-shirt too. See it all...

Meanwhile, we have finished "ENTER the DONKEY" and it will be available in mid-July. Come back then to purchase your copy.

watch the video trailer - CLICK HERE

2006-06-03T16:04:00.000-04:00

June turd, 2006

Criag Adams from New Zealand says, "the mustache is a valid life choice," and he is correct. See for yourself...

2006-05-23T16:02:00.000-04:00

May 20turd, 2006

Patman. Pat Bresnahan. He has done something so noble that he has earned a gajillion extra points in the mustache contest. Guess what he did?

click image to enalrge. Clicker here to see this week's contestants

2006-05-16T16:00:00.000-04:00

This contest is ruling my life. If we're gonna do this again next year we have to have a sponsor who pays something. I wonder if Gilette or Norelco would sponsor this event? Any connections out there in the paddling world?

Today we lost an ambassador. Israel Putnam has shaved. Collect the hi-res image for your very own copy. Click the image for hi-res. Wish you hadn't.

(sorry this image is no longer available. israel was extremely ashamed.)

In the wake of Israel's loss of stache we've had an old friend, Ray Capone check in with us.

Ray is living life somewhat happily without a mustache.

And, Steve Althaus takes it to the next level again.

See it with your own eyes. Use Discretion...

2006-05-12T15:59:00.000-04:00

Hutch Brown of Huge Experiences creates a new mustache style today, "the CATFISH"...

2006-05-02T15:57:00.000-04:00

Happy May people. This year is flying by already. I can't believe it.

Chris Gragtmans and I spent the weekend working on our new kayak video, "Enter The Donkey." It is almost finished but will not be released until July. You will be able to purchase it here at the Effort.tv store. Joey Hall is also involved and will be working on his parts of the video soon as well. We are going to try and have our good friend Ronnie Pender host the world premiere in Columbia, SC sometime in June. More on that later. He he, more on. Moreon. Moron.

Now the stupidest news that you've all been waiting for. The mustache contest update. Steve Althaus has sent another mind blowing entry in this week. See it all...

See Steve

2006-04-25T15:56:00.000-04:00

Numbers have significantly dropped this week in the mustache contest. Five weeks left until total domination of one hair grower over the other.

See this week's action...

2006-04-18T15:54:00.000-04:00

Moffatt Prescott strives for the stalker award in the Mustache Contest. See his demented self portrait...

Meanwhile, all the competitors have become the sleazebags we had hoped they would. Read more...

2006-04-12T15:53:00.000-04:00

Mustache competition grows fierce. Click to see..

2006-04-04T15:51:00.000-04:00

Mustache contest begins! This is gonna be good.

Whoever said humiliation did not bring families together? Read more...

Austin & Evan Smith - Father/Son entry

2006-03-27T21:58:00.000-05:00

Today I got a pair of Mion shoes and wore them down the Green. I think these things are going to be the best paddling shoe ever. They have this awesome style called the Flood Tide, which is what I have. Here's what it looks like...

The unique thing about this shoe is that the inside is like a bootie that is removable. You can slide the outer sandal part into the back of your boat and just wear the bootie while paddling. It's an ingenious idea and I think a lot of people are going to be really impressed with this brand.

www.MionFootwear.com for info

2006-03-24T21:57:00.000-05:00

Added some Riot demo dates to the calendar...

I know this friend named Jason Aytes who has this cool blog called www.kayakculture.blogspot.com Heh, in Canada they call it a blug. That's funny. Blug. Like, "hey are you going to make a blug post or something." Or, "hey, I saw your blug the other day." And we wouldn't even know what they were talking about. Cause it's in Canadian. And I dont' read Canadian. Jason is Americanese though so he understands. He's the guy with the chin and the teeth. He may be growing an impressive mustache soon. All of this is really making sense.

2006-03-21T21:55:00.000-05:00

Sincere apologizes to my two viewers for not updating the site recently. There's really no excuse except that I've been trying to do some stuff that actually makes money and pays the bills. And I haven't done a very good job at that.

News today...

In cooperation with Catalyst Media (Chris Gragtmans) & Deadman Productions (Joey Hall), Effort Inc will produce it's first DVD, to be realeased soon. Probably around May. The self esteemed flic will be named...

ENTER THE DONKEY

More on this as things develop.

It has some to my attention that some people think that the Mustache Contest is a joke. Well, it is a joke, but it's a real contest too. Starts April 1.

Next, I put up a new trip report on the Riot Blog. Last week Chris Gragtmans and I went to the NAWFest and to Rock Island. Twas fun.

Words, video, photos... Wow!

Finally, a new dealer profile on the site. It's for Rock Creek Outfitters in TN. These guys are awesome and have been a huge supporter of mine for several years. Check them out.

Read more...

I have recently had some new images published in various spots.

See the published page in the photo section...

Thanks for coming out. I'll be here all week, Effort.tv

2006-03-02T21:54:00.000-05:00

Well, it's official. The "new car smell" in my 2004 model vehicle has all but dissipated and has now been replaced by a permanent fart odor. Not sure how that happened... hmmmm... Oh. Bound to happen when you spend countless hours behind the wheel. What, do you expect a person to hold it? That's self mutilation.

So the real interesting thing is that when you hit the seat with your hand it omits a stale fart smell. I guess there's a ton of stored up fart gas in the seat. I knew I should have spent the extra money and gotten leather seats. Doh!

More extremely important news:

Today we announced the incredible prize packages for the Mustache Contest. See the details with your own eyes...

And, and and and... a huge Mustache Contest fan writes in with some suggestions. Read...

There was some other important news but nothing as pressing as those things. That's it for now. Now stay off the drugs dang it.

2006-02-24T21:52:00.000-05:00

I feel honored to work for such weirdos. John and Kara Weld are truly freaks of nature.

They must live underneath some power lines. Ooh! I bet that will make their mustache hair grow all funky or something.

Other strange news...

My good friend Joey Hall left me a present on my office wall recently. Everyone should see this. It is truly a work of art and a political statement about the economy... errrrr, terrorist acts and stuff...

Click it for fuller size

Effort.tv is thinking about making this into a t-shirt. It's crazy that this web site can think about t-shirt designs. Recently I interviewed Joey Hall about surf kayaking. That's something I like to do from time to time. Interview my friends. Anyway, Joey said that he, "don't need no surf report, he just goes to the beach." Spoken like a true professional ladies and gentlemen. He don't take no crap off nobody, and he don't need to surf report to go surfing. Now that's assertive!

More other news, not strange. Took a run on the Green River yesterday at 100% with some young fellers. Well, they're 10 years younger than me so I can call them young I guess.

We shot a little of the run... HERE

GREEN RIVER 02.23.06

2006-02-20T21:51:00.000-05:00

Congratulations to my friend Rob Bartlett, fellow paddler, who caught a delicious bass for us all to see. He was competing in the USA BASSIN' Tourney Chickamauga Lake in Tennessee this weekend where he won the Big Fish award.

Mmmmmm! That's delicious bass Rob! Now Rob aint afraid to compete in no Mustache Contest... are you big fella? Yeah, he'll be competing. Rob got facial hair growing skills. Reconize.

It's out. The Mustache Contest starts April 1st. Growing facial hair has never been so rewarding. Read the details and see how to enter...

2006-02-15T21:50:00.000-05:00

NEW! Groundbreaking video! A must see.

Go over there to the left and click on my video. Your life can't possibly go on without seeing this. Oh, here's the link too...Link

Also, check out this video. This is from an event my good friends at Oudoor Sports Marketing put on every year for their retailers. If you love the outdoors, backpacking, lake paddling and such, you'll like this. And the music is really nice, a la Flav-o-rich (from Raleigh, NC).

OSM Video - watch it, click here

Captain Caveman here is actually the singer of the music in that video . His new band, OATMEAL CONSPIRACY, debuts this friday night in Raleigh, NC. Look at their site.

Other news. Moustache growing contest, still being developed. Get ready!

2006-02-09T21:48:00.000-05:00

Here we go. I guess this is the news. Let's seeeeee. I put a post on the Riot Blog about Joey Hall. You could read that for some entertainment...read... Joey is a heehaw of a guy. So, we got that out of the way. Next on the list... issssss. Oh yeah, Joey and I competed at the first of a series of surf contests that the ESKA is putting on this Spring. This was in Jacksonville, FL. Read about dat too... Twas a ton of fun. We had wicked awesome surf. I took 2nd in HP & 3rd in IC. Jho took 1st inthe Big Trick Contest. This was the podium for the HP division. Left to right is Gordon Rock, Carlos Marrone, Myself, then Anthony Bell

Oh man, the biggest news of all. Soon Effort.tv will be hosting the first official Moustache Growing Contest of Paddle Sports. Come back soon to sign up, compete, humiliate yourself and maybe win a prize or not. It will be great. Since I'm the only one who reads this I'll be the only one to compete. All the fabulous prizes for me and a big lightening bolt moustache.

Ahhh, let's seeeee.... Nothing else I can think of. Crap.

2006-01-27T21:47:00.000-05:00

Note to self...since self is the only one who reads this: I'm glad to report to myself that Joey Hall, Chris Gragtmans and I have joined the team of Fortress Watches. Being a Fortress Team member I now consider myself a professional time teller.

Here are we three at the creek on the Saluda.

Oh, thanks a lot self. Maybe I'll run out and buy a Fortress watch now...click logo for fireworks

2006-01-22T21:45:00.000-05:00

Dear three, maybe four if I'm lucky, people who have ever visited my web site and propably won't return, and actually won't even see this,

1. Feel free to check out the Riot blog. I just made a post yesterday about the Saluda River in Columbia, SC. It's fun!...read it

2. I happen to really like surf kayaking and I plan on attending most of the events that the ESKA is putting on this Winter and Spring. First event is coming up very soon in Florida. Feb 4-5 in Jacksonville. See you there I hope.

visit ESKA site

2006-01-13T21:43:00.000-05:00

Here's some horror news for you on Friday the 13th. Have you ever wondered where all of a particular group of people are? Let's say you were Catholic, for example. Wouldn't it be cool if you knew where all the Roman Catholics were in the world and then have the ability to email or chat with them? Wellllllllllllll, my friend Felipe has done that on Frappr.com, except on a WAY WAY LARGER scale...for Surf Paddlers. Yes, you can now see where all those legendary Kayak Surfers live and send them some fan mail. Those famous people have to first register themselves on the site, but after that you can bug them all you want. Just go to this here linkypoo http://www.frappr.com/paddlesurfers

Nice idea Felipe! Good thinking. Now everyone will think that you invented Frappr.com and Myspace. Oh, that's right, you did. Sorry to insult you.

Also, you have to check out Felipe's Surf Page on myspace. It is dingdangdiggitydawg hilarious

http://www.myspace.com/surfelipe

2006-01-10T21:39:00.000-05:00

Two of my friend's bands put up new web sites today.

* OATMEAL CONSPIRACY *

Oatmeal is a jazzy, hiphop influenced collection headed up by my best friend Mitchell Morton. Mitch and the other Oatmeal guys were previously members of Flipside Phonics and Flavorich, now defunct, but da funct stayed with these guys. Listen to some sound samples on their site and listen for their songs on some of my upcoming videos.

* JAY BROWN *

Each time I've seen Jay play I think of Bob Dylan. Jay even played Subterrainian Homesick Blues for me one time...well, part of it anyway. Go see Jay Brown if you get a chance. He's very entertaining and a heck of a nice guy.

"Founding member of the old time, swing band Lazybirds, Jay Brown is focusing on his solo career"...Read more...

2005-12-25T18:24:00.000-05:00

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